So there I was, in the Congo...

The Congo Has Moved!!!!!

2004-03-25T16:57:00.000-05:00

Please visit me at http://www.inthecongo.com . See ya soon!

Check Out This Bad Mother Fucker!

2004-03-23T15:08:00.000-05:00

I am so excited. I just can't hide it... Oh wait, wrong post and/or song... Well I am excited none the less. Today I received my first heavy duty amateur camera. I have wanted to take up Photography for a while, see "Things To Do..." list, and now I have the chance. Soon there will be a companion photoblog to "In The Congo", as well as some other neat changes. My new camera consists of a Nikon D-70 with a SB 800 Speedlight and a Tamron AF28-300mm Ultra Zoom XR Lens and a one gigabyte flash card. It is time to take some serious pictures. I am super psyched about the cool shots I can get at shows. Maybe if I hone my skills I can become a show photographer for some kind of magazine, newspaper/zine, or site! Like I said, get excited. B.

Not Dr. Ruth, But Just As Old...

2004-03-22T15:57:00.000-05:00

Yesterday I was over at Brie's apartment catching up on my watching of the new season of the Sopranos. Afterwards we happened across a show on Oxygen, The Sunday Sex Show with Sue Johanson. This is some seriously funny shit. Brie said she had seen it before. It looked scary, Sue (pictured above) is very old. I was skeptical and then I heard the first caller. A woman from Des Moines, IO called in and said that when she watches game shows with her family she wants to have an orgasm when she finds out who the winner is. This is possibly the funniest thing I have ever heard. So what does old Sue say? She tells the lady to get a silent vibrator and take care of it in the bathroom after watching the show. What!? Then she starts to model different vibrators. That is where I decided this was truly a different show. The old lady freaked me out, but it was some comical stuff. Usually I do not recommend channels like Lifetime and Oxygen, but this maybe worth watching... B.

The Free Huey World Report...

2004-03-19T09:36:00.000-05:00

I must admit, I am confused. Being an NPR junkie I get no shortage of news, of course during this day and age it is hard not to. One word I hear over and over again is "al-Qaida". This is where I get confused. Much like most of America, this is what I know: (1) al-Qaida is a "loosely knit network of terrorists organizations", (2) They are Muslim extremists, (3) Osama Bin Laden is their leader, and (4) They are responsible for everything that blows up anywhere in the world. I have questions. First off, How can a "loosely knit network' have a leader, and more importantly be responsible for everything? The proof behind their responsibility seems a little shaky to me. All someone has to do is blow up something and then send an anonymous letter to a newspaper claiming to be in al-Qaida and poof, al-Qaida did it. This would not hold up in any court in the land, at least I hope not, yet the American people are just taking it a face value and not questioning a damn thing. Well, not everybody. On top of that, how do you go after such an anamorphous organization as al-Qaida. The answer, you don't, because al-Qaida itself is not an organization, just a network. At least the drug cartels are clearly defined organizations. It just seems to me that al-Qaida has become the American Boogie Man and a great scapegoat. I bet GW wishes he could pass a law making himself president until we topple al-Qaida, because it is never going to happen. What do y'all think about al-Qaida and what we as a nation can do about terrorists. I am curious. B

Top O' The Mornin' To Ya!

2004-03-17T15:22:00.000-05:00

I would like to wish everyone a very happy St. Patrick's Day. Being Irish Catholic and a lover of fine brew, this is my favorite holiday. I have been known to rank it slightly above Christmas, which falls slightly above my birthday. Needless to say it is a very important day. I am not quite sure what St. Pat chasing the snakes out of Ireland has to do with getting plowed, but who needs explanations? I hope all of you visitors to the Congo have an enjoyable and safe holiday, and be sure your wearing green. To paraphrase Riley "Escobar" Freeman from "The Boondocks" : "I'll be pinchin' fools just for livin"." May the luck of the Irish be with you all. B

My Favorite Artist...

2004-03-16T15:34:00.000-05:00

This honor goes to Leroy Neiman. Born on 1921, and still alive today, Neiman is called "The most popular and best known living artist in America". He also founded the modern school of American Impressionism. He is known for his capturing of popular culture, sports, and politics in brilliant colors and impressionistic style. His favorite medium is oil that is then silk screened onto limited prints called serigraphs. These prints retail for anywhere from three to ten thousand dollars. Neiman is a popular VIP at sporting events and can be found sketch pad in hand capturing the moment. My favorite paintings and etching of his are "Marylin" (pictured above), "John Lennon", "Howard Stern", "America's Cup", "Wine, Women & Cigars", "Desert Inn Baccarat", "Skier", "Sliding Home" (featuring the 1972 World Series Reds) and "Four Aces". The last three of which hang in my parent's house. Check out his site and see all the other wonderful work he has done. Neiman is an American treasure and will be missed when he is gone. If you are a fan of the Warhol celebrity portraits, wait until you see these. What do ya think? B.

Things To Do...

2004-03-15T10:16:00.000-05:00

Last Saturday Brie and I went with some friends to Birdy's to see some bands for a friend's birthday. We were unaware that it was a punk rock benefit night. We walked in and saw all the girls trying to be vamped out like Bettie Page and guys with leather and spiky hair. There was another group present that captivated my attention a couple tables away from us. There were two guys and three girls hanging out. The girls were vamped out like all the rest of the girls there, but the guys were different. The guys had 1950's greaser ultra-styled black hair with pointy side burns and were all tatted up. One guy was wearing a white t-shirt and the other guy was wearing a sky blue nylon jacket. On the shirt and jacket was written in script letters: "Emperors, Indianapolis" and in the middle of the words was a big crown looking emblem. I thought to myself, "These guys must be in an old-school Grease meets Hollywood Nights 50's style social club". I guess if retro fashion and furniture can come back, social clubs are fair game too. I saw this and instantly wanted to found one. I told this to Brie and she just kinda laughed. She told me: "Some people have no ideas, you have a new one everyday." I got to thinking about that and I decided to document my grand ideas. Very few of them ever get accomplished, so I have decided to make a "To Do List" on this blog of things I want to accomplish. Maybe I can get more motivated by seeing them everyday and getting feedback on them. Most people's to do lists are small like "take out the garbage" or "get a car wash". This list is on a grander scale. It includes perennial favorites like "Open a record store" and new ones like "Take up Kayaking". Tell me what you think of these goals and if you have any advice. Remember, dreams are only ideas without financial backing. Let's see what I can do. B.

Bootleggin In The New Millineum...

2004-03-11T17:07:00.000-05:00

Being the complete music nut that I am, I freaked out today when a guy at work showed me this site. I have about one thousand disks of live shows, but this site has stuff I have never seen. The Tori Amos and Phish sections are both fantastic. As a matter of fact I am currently downloading the Tori show I saw last year at the Murat. Check it out. You will be amazed... B

That Little Yellow Fucker...

2004-03-10T15:45:00.000-05:00

You all know who I am taking about. I was talking to Scott today and was reminded of one of my least favorite experiences on the phone. I was calling AOL to cancel a subscription that one of my siblings had signed up for. I had to call three times. I did not think the first 2 assholes would actually cancel it, so I hung up and called back. The third guy finally did it. Credit Card companies are the same way. When you call to cancel "free" services it takes forever. Has anyone else had problems like these? Feel free to vent... B

New Music Tuesday...

2004-03-09T16:15:00.000-05:00

This week I am going to try out a new segment here in the Congo. Being as Tuesday is the nation record release day, I going to offer you up my opinions of some new wax fresh off the presses. I will not limit myself to music released today but all recent releases and advances are fair game. This week's album is Forget Cassettes Instruments of Action.

Forget Cassettes should be Forget The White Stripes. Cassettes has a similar 2 person girl/boy line up except the roles have changed. Anyone who says that The White Stripes are cool because Meg, a girl, plays the drums is just plain wrong. Nothing against her, but she sucks. Cassettes takes a harder edge to garage sound and Beth and Doni rock hard. Beth's hauntingly sweet yet edgy, and sometimes screaming with rage and anger, vocals and Doni's complex 5/4 beats with interesting and not over used double bass beats make for an great listen. The fact that they venture into more complex territory than their garage rock brethren really separates them from the pack. The debut album Instruments of Action has sleepy, lullaby lows and screaming, cathartic highs. Think of the Kinks at a hardcore show saying "hmmm, maybe we could do that...". In the beginning it is kind of strange but it works well. Song highlights include "Like Tiny Swords" and Beth's description of a May/December relationship in "Bruce Wayne". This album is fresh at a time when most everything is the same lo-fi rip off. Definitely check it out. B.

Arranging Your Records Autobiographically...

2004-03-08T12:30:00.000-05:00

There is a great scene in my favorite move, High Fidelity, in which Dick comes over to Rob's apartment and finds him depressed and sorting his records. Dick asks Rob if he is sorting them chronologically or alphabetically. Rob's response is that he is doing neither, he is sorting them autobiographically; if he wants to find Fleetwood Mac Rumors he has to remember that it is in the fall of '74 pile and that he bought it for someone else but kept it for personal reasons. Dick's response is a very appropriate: "No fucking way!"

The other day I was think about this because I am about to sort my album collection. This task takes no less than six to eight hours. I was also thinking about my top five favorite songs and what they are. I realized that my top five favorite songs, whatever they are at the moment, are so because they are extremely important autobiographically. These songs may not be the best or most representative, but they take me someplace long gone. Music maybe aurally stimulating, but some songs bring back all senses to a specific time and place. So, without further ado, here are my All Time Top Five Songs for Autobiographical Reasons:

5. Pearl Jam - Black - Year: 1994 - Memory: This was my first real girlfriend's favorite song. I was a young kid with long black hair in braids. We listen to it on headphones we were sharing on a bus to Old Indiana Amusement Park.

4. Phish - Sample in a Jar - Year: 1996 - Memory: I had been listening to a tape of the song I had made from Tim James and was really digging it. I some how managed to score tickets to see them at Deer Creek that summer. It was an amazing show and they encored with this song. I was a huge fan ever since. Over 52 shows later, that one is still my favorite.

3. Pharcyde - She Keeps Passin Me By - Year: 1996 - Memory: This is a story for another time. Trust me it's a good one. Sprunger, you where there...

2. Big Head Todd and the Monsters - Bittersweet - Year: 1997 - Memory: The band I was in at the time, At Random, or to some of the Proximity girls, The Bearded Seals, played this song all the time. I think it is a great song and it is a lot of fun to play.

1. Tori Amos - Winter - Year: 1995 - Memory: A girl that I had a huge crush on and was my best friend at the time introduced me to this song. She could play piano and sing very well and would play this all the time. I still get chills.

What are your top songs for autobiographical reasons? B.

Another Promise Broken...

2004-03-04T15:59:00.000-05:00

Once again GW has lied, not that I am surprised. Except this time it is a very tacky lie. In the wake of September 11, 2001 Bush said that he would not use the events for political gain. That is just plain not true. The first ads that he put out for his re-election campaign are all about 9-11-2001. Shocking, no. Tacky, yes. Everyone know that he was a joke before he became the political equivalent of Rambo on that day. It is no surprise that he would want to capitalize on it. So the guy made a few speeches and killed a couple thousand people, that hardly makes him a good president. I am sure every president ever wished he could have as good of a cop out as GW. Times get tough, say 9-11, people shut up. Sorry GW not this time. To view the ads go here. What do you think? B

Unfashionable Wars...

2004-03-03T15:30:00.000-05:00

I was thinking the other day, what ever happened to the war on drugs? First there was the Cold War. That is how they scared our parents and grandparents. Then there was the War on Drugs. They used this one on us. Now our younger siblings and children have the War on Terror. The way I see it, we are fighting enough real wars, why do we need wars on things? Granted it could be good like LBJ's War on Poverty. I miss the WOD, okay that's a lie, but at least that didn't involve much fighting and killing, oh wait, that's a lie too. Politicians apparently like word "war". There must be some connotation about beating the shit out of a thing that makes we Americans like it. I mean you never saw Ghengis Kahn or Attila the Hun declare war on things and ideas. They we more concerned about war for survival, a novel concept and one I think we have completely forgotten. I guess the bottom line is that you can't win a war on a thing. There is no State to conquer, no leader to depose, no rebellion to quell. So what does this mean? As far as I can tell, it means the people in power have a blank check to do what they will in the name of vanquishing this idealized menace. War on people is easy, they are dead, you win. War on things is much harder. Maybe we still have a War on Drugs and it is just not cool enough for the media anymore. The War on Terror makes such better headlines. I think we should be politically retro and where red ribbons and just say no buttons, oh and don't forget your D.A.R.E. t-shirt. I mean come on how idie would that be? What are your favorite fictional/ idealistic wars? B.

Forget Napster...

2004-03-02T16:31:00.000-05:00

I have good news for anyone who is sick of Kazza, Imesh, or paying for I-Tunes. Thanks to Mr. Er@serhe@d I have found a much better way to expand my music collection. It is called Soul Seek. Soul Seek is a new peer to peer client with an interesting twist. If you donate five dollars a month to their development effort you get to bypass the download queues. This mean a world of high speed, high quality music is instantly at your fingertips. I have been using it now for a couple of days and I am super impressed. I suggest all of you give it a try. The chat rooms are extremely funny. If you want a real laugh check out the "Inde" chat room. Pretenious bastards like you read about. Give it a whirl and let me know what you think of it. B.

And the winner is...

2004-03-01T10:14:00.000-05:00

Last night, for the first time in the history of the world, the Oscars were right on. I agreed with every award given. Not to mention, I really enjoyed the show as well. Starting off it had me in stitches. The CGed intro for Billy Crystal was a little cheesy but when Michael Moore came out and said "Shame on you hobbits. This is a ficticious war!" I was rolling on the floor. Mitch and Mickey from A Mighty Wind performing their nominee for best song was also quite funny. I also learned a little about fashion last night, apparently beards are in and Tim Robbins and Peter Jackson showed it is cool to where buttons on your lapel. Although, Heath Ledger was a target for scorn. I was shocked he was with some on like Naomi Watts. I said that he was just like Aston Krutcher, but he had a little more class. Heath was also bearded. Adrian Brody's presentation of the Best Actress to Charlize Theron was also rather funny. The breath spray was a nice touch. Needless to say RTOK deserved everything it got. Sean Penn, Charlize Theron, Finding Nemo, Sofia Coppola, and Tim Robbins all were quite deserving as well. The Academy actually did well this year. My favorite part of the night was when Peter Jackson is accepting the award for Best Picture and he says that the Academy wisely overlooked Meet the Feebles and Bad Taste. I thought they were good. All in all a fine showing by fine talent. Lets hope next year can be this good. B.

What the Hell Is Going On?

2004-02-26T16:51:00.000-05:00

The countdown has started. There are two hundred and fifty one days until the election. Bush and the conservative right see the end is coming. This must be why things are going to hell so quickly right now. Apparently they have decided that they need to cause as much damage as possible in the time they have left. At the very tip of the iceberg we have things like new media censorship and obscenity laws. I was pretty sure that Larry Flint and others went to court and jail many times to change those to what they are now. This is quickly changing. Howard Stern is gone, who knows who is next. CBS is apologizing for damn near everything and MTV is trying to be more family friendly. I think they are taking the "it takes a village" thing a little far. Next we have gay marriage. Bush is trying to get an amendment to ban this. This would be the first amendment to the Constitution since Prohibition that takes away as opposed to granting rights. We all saw how well Prohibition worked. On top of that we have new laws being passed about fetal rights, a not-so-slippery slope to the end of Abortion. And lastly we have a whole lot of people bitching about Mel Gibson's The Passion of the Christ. Everyone is saying how it is too graphic and, my favorite, the Marque de Sade's version of the death of Jesus. Last I checked Jesus was not beaten to death with down filled pillows. He died a horrible and gruesome death. For being a founding tenet of most of these critics beliefs they sure don't like to remember it. It is ok to say "Jesus died for us" or to hold up "John 3:16" posters at sports games, but if people actually see it they can't deal. What is a young liberal guy to do? The answer: Vote as soon as possible. Sure we can't get rid of the critics and the crazy right wingers, but maybe we can stop some of the other madness. The news these days is so depressing but you have to pay attention so you know what to fight. What are you outraged by these days? B.

You're Kidding, Right?

2004-02-25T16:11:00.000-05:00

For some reason that I will never understand Maxim Magazine has chosen Landsharks in Broad Ripple as the Bar of the Month. I am shocked, amazed, and horrified. Obviously they have never been to this bar. Although it is cool to have a bar from Indy in Maxim, why Landsharks? Anyone who was ever been there knows that it sucks. At best it is a sleazy meat market with a shitty dance floor and really bad live bands. I mean Ryan Jacobs played their regularly for God's sake. In the article they claim to have girls dancing on the bar and girls in bikinis, this is just a lie. Okay, the girl at the beer tub does wear a bikini top, but no girl has ever danced on the bar. I don't even think it is possible. Of all the bars in Indianapolis, let alone all the bars in the country, how did this shit hole get the nod? I respect Maxim. I respect what they have to say. I find it humorous and insightful, but this is over the top. Matt has said that he is going to write a letter to Maxim in hopes that they realize the grave mistake they have made. I say we start a letter writing campaign. Tell your friends, family, co-workers, anyone you know. Maybe we can get this place publicly shamed to point they have to close their doors forever. Granted the bars on the strip in Ripple are not known for their outstanding class, but there has to be something better than this. I like drinking. I like seeing live bands. I like dancing. There are a million places I would do these before Landsharks. We live in a sad world when this can happen. Does no one have standards anymore? Let me know what you think. B

The Color War...

2004-02-24T16:09:00.000-05:00

We do not live in a black and white world. We try tool fool ourselves sometimes with newspapers and arty photographs, but in real life we have color. Some people are born with a natural knack for color. Some people spends semesters of their collegiate life studying color theory. Some people are color blind and have an excuse. I am none of these. I am color illiterate. Things like shade, hue, tint, and saturation elude me. I live in a Roy G. Biv world. Unfortunately there are millions of other colors that I know nothing about. No wonder the majority of my wardrobe consists of greens and blues, with an occasional daring foray into a red, purple, or orange. I can not match colors in my clothes and I definitely can not decorate. I guess this is why I have spent all of my art energy in the black and white world of music and literature. This is my dilemma. I can not color coordinate my blog. I have tried, I hate everything I come up with. I have used sites with long lists of css color names, color wizards, and web color wheels. None of this has helped. So I am going to start a contest. The person who can come up with the best color scheme for my blog gets the prize and trust me it is a good prize. All suggestions are accepted, however if it is bad, you will be publicly humiliated. The only rule is no pink or lavender. Other than that anything goes. I know I have some artists friends out there, hell I am even dating an artist. I don't know how she can date a color-challenged person like myself. She must be very patient. I look forward to seeing everyone's cool ideas. The winner will be announced at the end of the week. Have fun! B

Monday Quiz...

2004-02-23T14:37:00.000-05:00

Hey Everyone! I've decided to change things up a little up a little and have a Monday Quiz today. Adriana sent me this and I thought it was kinda funny. Give this a whirl. Are you a Yankee or a Dixie? B.

Oh, What a Day...

2004-02-20T15:21:00.000-05:00

As I sit here at work, beer in hand, I can just think of how much it needs to be five o'clock. This day and/or week has been kinda rough. Luckily I have had good tunes to help me through it. I am excited for some Hawaiian party action host by one of the famous Proximity bloggers. The overhaul of Prox and the Watts has given me some drive to change things around a bit too. If anyone has ideas on how to make it better please let me know. I may even experiment with some Micro fonts. We'll see. I hope everyone has a good and restful weekend. God knows I need it. B

Concert Announcements...

2004-02-19T10:15:00.000-05:00

I have a couple quick concert announcements here in the Congo this morning for the Indy area. Just remember kids, you heard it here first. The Pernice Brothers are going to play Radio, Radio on April 4th. Better than that, the Long Winters are opening for them. Get excited two great bands in a super small club. Also on March 30th The Pushstars have been slated to join Great Big Sea at The Patio. Concert season is starting to swing into full bore, there is just nothing better than live music. Also next week do not forget Erica Badu or Big Head Todd and the Monsters on Monday February 23rd. If you are really adventurous check out The Big Wu at The Patio this evening. All of these shows are guaranteed to be a fun night of great music. Enjoy. B

Dean Out of Race, Kinda...

2004-02-18T17:04:00.000-05:00

Today at 1:00 PM Howard Dean announced he was out of the race for the presidency. This is a shame, but we must move on. He did not endorse either John Kerry or John Edwards. He also is not running on a third party ticket. He said he will keep his organization together to start a grass roots effort. The main point of his speech was that the most important thing to do is to get Bush out of the White House. Dean will continue to be a strong voice in the Democratic party. His supporters are thought to go the Edwards camp, but nothing is sure yet. With Dean out there is no choice for the thousands of young people who felt he was their candidate. Me being one of them. I agree with Dean that the dethroning of Bush is the number one issue, but I would like to see someone go into the Oval Office with severe change in mind. Let's hope all of this hope is not lost. B

A Good Day In Music

2004-02-17T14:36:00.000-05:00

The past couple of days have been great for music. First I picked up "Cash Unearthed". Read my review at BlogCritics to find out more. Needless to say, a fine set. I also found a new radio station on the Net that a friend told me about. WOXY out of Cincinnati seems to be a real independent radio station. They play stuff like Modest Mouse, Sun Kil Moon, The Coral, The Bens, Primus, Outkast, among others. Definitely worth a listen. I also got play DJ last night at the Wellington. I got to subject the shirt and tie crowd to some Postal Service, Idlewild, Jets to Brazil, Gomez, and Badly Drawn Boy. It was alot of fun. We also played some of the new Johnny Cash set as well. I was in a music drought for a while now it is pouring down. I am convinced that the only thing better than your old favorites is new music. Check this stuff out, I am sure you guys will like it. B

Bloggin' Cajun Style: Surviving Bourbon Street and the Aftermath...

2004-02-16T16:10:00.000-05:00

I am back home in Indy after my short excursion to the Big Easy. For those of you who don't know, I was down there for a training class for work. I left Wednesday at noon at got back to town on Saturday at 5:00 in the afternoon. I maybe slept eight hours on the entire trip. When we last left our hero (me), he was about to venture to the French Quarter for the first time...

I met a guy from class at his hotel which was a block from Bourbon Street. He had been there before so he decided to show me around. We walked up and down Bourbon so I could check it out. I saw it all. The movies and television at best understate the party here. I thought people in Vegas knew how to party. Sin City has nothin' on the Big Easy. It is all true. It rained beads and large groups of people gathered around drunk topless women. I even saw the camera crew from Girls Gone Wild. If you look close you may see me in the background. There were all kinds. I saw your typical drunk frat boys, little kids, old couples, and my favorite: old business men in suits with girls a third their age in orange mohair miniskirts. Yeah pops you didn't pay her my ass. I was in shock and awe. We cruised around a little and decided we were thirsty. We went into the Howl at the Moon piano bar. Aside from drinks being a little expensive, it was a fun place. We heard all kinds of typical piano bar fair as well as stuff I did not expect like "Old McDonald" with a farm near a nuclear power plant and lisping snakes, narcoleptic pigs, and Turets Syndrome chickens. They also did a surprising good rendition of "Hey Ya!". That was a real treat. So after hanging out there and getting rock star drunk I caught a cab back to my haunted abode. I did not see any ghosts per say but there were creepy noises and rattling. I did walk through Lafayette cemetery Number 1 at night and that was super creepy. It is the cemetery that is in Interview with a Vampire. The next day I had class again and then back down to Bourbon for more of the same. That place is one hell of a party. There is even talk of going back this weekend. I have done Vegas and now Mardi Gras. Mardi Gras wins hands down. I will be returning for sure. Some things I have learned this week include: Never swim in fresh water in Alabama; If a young child bets you a dollar that he knows where you got your shoes you say "On my feet"; and don't walk too far down Bourbon Street if you are not a transvestite. All in all a great time and I even got to finish Don DeLillo's White Noise, look for a BlogCritics review soon. Also look for a picture post soon. B.

Bloggin' Cajun Style: Day 2

2004-02-12T21:01:00.000-05:00

Wow. This place is a serious trip. After a long day of drinking bourbon in airports I was prepared for an early night. I figured in bed by 10:00 at the latest. I could not have been more wrong. My friend Marianne gave me the name and numbers of a couple of her friends to call so I would have someone to hangout with. So I called Dan and we went out at 11:00. Later than I expected, but hell, when in Rome, right? We went to a super pretentious place called The Wine Loft. We were also with two girls and two guys from Ecuador, who by the way spoke Spanish to each other almost the entire night. So here I am with five people I have never met before, in a town I don't know, and at some high class wine bar. Just call me Raoul Duke. I bought this ticket, I might as well take the trip. It ended up not so bad. They were nice people and of course I managed to strike a music conversation. We agreed on Zepplin. Oh, and I was drinking Maker's Mark with a vengeance. I got back to the inn at 2:00 AM, tanked. Waking up at 7:00 AM this morning was rough. I was wicked hungover and maybe still a little drunk. So I take a shower, brush my teeth twice and jumped a trolley for class. Class was not so bad, aside from the massive pain. I learned a lot and I think the product is pretty great. After class I came back to the inn and took a light nap. I mean how does one sleep well in Haunted House? I woke up and was of to a steak house name Dickie Brennen's. I told the inn keeper this and she said not to go. She told me about a place called Charlie's and said that was the best bet. So off I go to Charlie's. What a trip. Imagine the worst VFW or American Legion you have ever been to. Now take that down another couple of notches. That is what this place looked like. The waitstaff was a few days older than God and a little younger that Oprah. There was also no menu. Now with all this I was a little apprehensive. What I got was some of the best food I have had, and arguably the best steak. They even have a step below rare, called "purple". Of course I had to go with this. The steak came out sizzling hot and super good. Never judge a book by it's cover. I am now about to rest before heading to the quarter for some jazz. I'll check in soon. Keep it real until then. B

New Orleans...

2004-02-11T22:16:00.000-05:00

Hello everyone from New Orleans! That's right, The Congo is broadcasting live from the Big Easy. I arrived here at around three in the afternoon and have been enjoying it ever since. This place is a trip! I am staying in the Garden District, just down the street from the French Quarter at a place called the Castle Inn Bed and Breakfast. My room is great and I love what I have seen of the city. Stay tuned for pictures which are sure to follow. I ate a place this evening called Igor's Garlic Clove. Absolutely amazing food. If you go try the Chicken Anna, wicked good. I am off the enjoy some more of the city. I will write with more updates tomorrow. See y'all soon. B

Can I See Your Papers Please...

2004-02-10T10:45:00.000-05:00

Last week the Department of Homeland Security conducted sweeps in Portland, Maine looking for illegal immigrants. It arrested 10 people and harassed countless others. After going through a local social outreach shelter they set up shop outside of a Mexican grocery and asked everyone who exited for their citizenship or immigration papers. This caused a panic in the Latino community in Portland and caused many legal Latino citizens not to leave their houses and not even send their children to school. Last Saturday people gathered in the streets to protest these actions. Even the mayor of Portland was appalled. I was pretty sure that one of the benefits of being in this country was that you could move around freely without being asked for your "papers". This is a practice that was common in fascist countries like World War II Germany, Spain, and Italy. Something tells me that this is not making our country inherently safer. I think it is important that we do not tolerate this kind of activity. We must not desensitize ourselves to such acts. Anyone who is in the United States legally should be free from fear of harassment about their legitimacy. This seems to me like just another in a long line of infringements by the Department of Homeland Security. I understand the need to improve safety but if the choice is between safety and freedom, I'll always choose freedom. Patrick Henry said "Give me liberty or give me Death". New Hampshire's state motto is "Live Free or Die!". Have we as Americans become so comfortable and so afraid that we are willing to cash in liberty at the first sign of possible harm? That's not what being American means to me. What do you think? B.

Get Down Charlie Brown...

2004-02-09T14:20:00.000-05:00

From our friends at Gothamist, check out "Hey Ya!" Charlie Brown style. This is great! B.

Cry Me a River...

2004-02-09T09:58:00.000-05:00

When I look a the list of winners, that is what I want to do. I want to cry. Granted their are a few awards that are well deserved, but on a whole I am pretty sure this show was the nail in the coffin. I have officially lost all faith in humanity, or at least the record industry. I am happy that Outkast won Album of year with Speakerboxxx/The Love Below, but look at their competition: Missy Eliot, hardly the most prolific of song writers and should definitely lose for her association with all things puffy suit; Evanescence, a modern rock band whose breakthrough hit came on the "Daredevil" sound track, please; Justin Timberlake, enough said; and the White Stripes, although good I hardly think the record of the year should sound like it has been recorded on a 4-track in your garage on purpose. In a way I am glad that Outkast won not only because I love the album(s), but because if any of the others had won I would be really pissed. I am happy with best Folk going to Warren Zevon, even though JT beat him for best Pop Vocal, best Bluegrass going to Alison Krauss, and best short video going to Johnny Cash for his cover of Hurt. However I super pissed about things like Sean Paul winning best Reggae Album, Bob Marley and Peter Tosh are rolling over in their graves. The fact that Beyonce won five awards just makes me sick. I thought this was an award show about music not little girls who shake their ass and get pimped out by their fathers. The fact that 50 Cent did not win a goddam thing does however harm my soul. I did not watch but I heard the performances were awful as well. Hard to believe. Oh, wait no it's not. I know what to expect. It is the same every year, but I think it is getting slowly worse. It is just a matter of time before TRL votes are counted for Grammys. I guess that is why we have reverted to being musical tree-top flyers. We must search out music from below the mainstream radar before it gets twisted. In that sad state of affairs that is pop music at least we have something to listen to. What do you all think about the Grammys? B

Get Excited...

2004-02-06T16:11:00.000-05:00

In the effort to infect as many people as possible with my ideas I have become a BlogCritic. That's right, the sinister cabal of superior bloggers has selected me to contribute to their wonderful blog. You can find my first post here. We here in the Congo are very happy. I have always wanted to be a critic and now I have a chance to pander my views to the masses. Do not worry, the content here in the Congo will not suffer. You can be guaranteed the same quality and quantity that you all have grown to love. Please continue to post your comments on both sites, you know I love to hear them. Until next time please enjoy my new expansion in group blogging. B

I Don't Like Country Music...

2004-02-05T15:07:00.000-05:00

At least I think I don't. Some how I am slowly getting drawn in. It all started with alt.country. At first it was too twangy for me, and then I started to really like it. I still said that I drew the line at alt.country though except for George Jones, Johnny Cash, and Merle Haggard. Any more though I am not so sure. Last night I was over at Brie's waiting for some people to show up. We had just finished watching the latest episode of Sex in the City and were flipping channels. Thanks to the wonders of the menu guide on digital cable I saw a show called "Morning After: The 40 Greatest Drinking Songs of All Time". The only problem was that it was on CMT. I decided to throw caution to the wind and flipped to it. I watched the entire show. It turns out I really enjoyed it. My top three country artists were all on it multiple times as well as some other songs I enjoyed. Of course Garth Brooks took number one with "Friends in Low Places" but I really think the number two spot Hank Williams Jr. with "Family Tradition" was more deserving of the win. The show link above has the complete countdown. Maybe in my old age I am growing less bigoted about my musical choice or maybe I am just getting soft. I'm not quite sure. Maybe I just like drinking songs, I am German-Irish. All in all I would recommend watching it if you want to expand your musical horizons, it is playing all this month. Enjoy. B

Blame the Puritans...

2004-02-04T14:19:00.000-05:00

For some reason Americans are under the false impression that our country was settled by a bunch of freedom loving, democratic, and tolerant people. Nothing could be further from the truth. With all the craziness this week about the media and obscenity I am glad that we can look back and find one group of people to thank. Those people are the Puritans. Our county was basically founded by a group of people who were so heinously intolerant they were kicked out of their own countries. That is a scary thought. When I think of one thing that a lot of people like and want it is sex. Most people like nakedness. Why is part of a breast on national television such a big deal then? TiVo has said it was the most paused live television in their history. People obviously enjoyed it, then why the big fuss? In Europe and most of the rest of the world nakedness on television in no big deal at all. Why do we care? We don't. They do. They being the Puritans and crazy religious folks. My favorite thing so far has been this post from Optimus Crime. MTV was just trying to give people what they wanted. I say that this oppression is nothing less than the tyranny of minority. As of late we have been trying to get back to what our country was literally founded on, not the hidden meanings. This should be no exception. B

Reviews: Sarah Vowell's Partly Cloudy Patriot and Patty Jenkins' Monster

2004-02-03T10:58:00.000-05:00

Partly Cloudy Patriot: This is with out a doubt one of the best books I have read in recent memory. Sarah Vowell and I are on such the same page it is uncanny. From the small personal things like being in marching band in high school and being active participants in political email discussion groups to the really big things like being Jeffersonian Democrats and liking the same TV shows. She gets upset at the same things I do, like someone putting a flag on her lawn on the 4th of July and not asking her permission. She even goes as far as explaining Al Gore by sighting a conversation between Jordan Catalano and Brian Krakow on My So Called Life. By the way I am a huge MSCL fan. If you look up "Byron Schaller" on Google two of the responses are high scores for an online MSCL trivia game. She also talks a lot about Giles versus Willow on Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I thought that was neat too. She has great politics and likes the same stuff I do so it is kinda hard not think this book is great. It was also very funny and made a lot of sense. Any true patriot will enjoy this book, but for us on the nerdier end of the spectrum this is a real treat. A must read.

Monster: This is one of the most intense films I have ever seen. I am not new to cinema extremes and I have seen this all before, just not quite like Monster. I have seen the rape/revenge/mass murder plot line before in I Spit on Your Grave!. I have seen Florida white trash true crime before in Bully. I have seen clandestine lesbian relationships in both Bound and Mulholland Drive. And that's not even considering foreign films. Yet something about this movie really struck a chord. I think a lot of it has to do with the score provided by BT. The background music really drives the high power intense scenes. Most of the movie it is hard to tell who to feel sorry for. Do you feel sorry for Lee or her johns? There are a couple that a very hard to tell and a couple where the decision is far easier. The real mark of this film is that you leave feeling like you have been hit by a truck. The experience is so intense and overwhelming that forming a valid response as the credits roll is almost impossible. For someone who is shockproof and seen it all, this kind of impact says a lot. A must see and award worthy all the way. B

Big Winners...

2004-02-02T14:56:00.000-05:00

Superbowl XXXVIII (38) is now history, so how has it effected the world. Let's see: The Patriots are the big winner in a battle of who could care less, Tom Brady is all of sudden being compared to Joe Montana, Jake Delhomme has made a name for himself, and I am a whole fifteen dollars richer. I says a lot about a game when you have to gamble on it to make it even a little fun. Last night was all about a total lack of quality. The game was barely entertaining. The commercials were sub-par. And the halftime show sucked, aside from Janet of course. I mean what do you get when you combine P. Diddy, Kid Rock, and Nelly and they all sing old songs. Fuck me, it was horrible. In fact NFL Commissioner Paul Tagliabue said in a statement about it: "The show was offensive, inappropriate and embarrassing to us and our fans." Something tells me he was not talking about Janet at the end either. That was the best part. Loving football and music however, I was offended by the incredible lack of actual talent on display. Hasn't U2 played a halftime show? It is a sad day when the biggest day in sports amounts to this... B

I love NPR...

2004-01-29T17:49:00.000-05:00

I am a huge fan of music but for some unknown reason talk radio has weaseled it's way into my life. I am not quite sure how this happened but now I wonder how I ever got along without it. I was listening to "Day to Day" on my lunch hour today and Alex Chadwick had some interesting stories. Here are three of them. The first is about a fellow blogger named Crystal Evans who publishes BeingHomeless.com. Crystal had been homeless for 3 years and for the past year has been blogging about it via the Boston Public Library's public internet terminals. On Monday of this week she got an apartment with the help of a couple in Cambridge who read her blog. Although not now currently homeless she is still going to use her blog to fight for the homeless and share their plight. The second story they had on was a little lighter. It was about Ebay auction where a girl was auctioning herself off to be someone's imaginary girlfriend for one month. I thought this was hysterical. Nerd culture has taken an entirely new gruesome twist. I went to eBay to check this out but I forgot the item number so I searched for "imaginary girlfriend". It got 79 hits. I thought this was one girl but apparently it has grown into quite the fad. Some girls even come with a pair of worn underwear. I am not quite sure how I feel about this very strange, yet tame, form of prostitution. Weird. The last story that had was an interview with the founder of Despair Inc.. Despair is one of my favorite online stores. They sell anti-motivational supplies. If you have ever been sick of "Sucessories", check these guys out. See kids, NPR is not just for dorks. It is a fun place where you can hear about all kinds of crazy things. Check it out, you just might like it. B

New Gaping Void Cartoons...

2004-01-29T15:28:00.000-05:00

More Cartoons can be found here.

Review: Gomez at Birdy's Indianapolis, Indiana

2004-01-28T16:19:00.000-05:00

What do you get when you take 6 guys from England, a small club packed to the brim, and one very cold winters day? The answer: one hell of a show. These six Brits are Gomez. For band with very little radio play and mainstream exposure they almost sold the place out. I came to learn later that many fans at the show had driven from as far away as Northern Michigan and Wisconsin in borderline blizzard conditions. The fan's drive was not in vain. After the previous show in Cincinnati was snowed out and cancelled the band decided to rock Indy twice as hard. Tom Gray (guitar, keys, and vocals) lead the charge. Feeding of off the crowd noise and shooting it right back, a crowd that was head bobbing started going nuts. They started off with a couple of favorites including the last single off of In Our Gun, "Shot, Shot". In Our Gun was written in 2001 as a response to the election of George Bush. Needless to say, it is my favorite of their efforts so far. A couple of songs later they played the title track which masquerades as a nice ballad and then proceeds to rock out hard, the crowd went nuts. The band also debuted a hand full of new songs off of their forthcoming March release. All were solid, well written, and a whole lot of fun to dance to. After playing close to a two hour set, the band left the stage and came back for a 5 song encore. They played two of my favorites as encores: "Detroit Swing 66" and "Revolutionary Kind". The later devoling into front man Ian Ball playing solo and drawing out the chorus, very cool and a nice surprise ending. The sheer energy these guys poured into the show and a great crowd response made them a bit hit. I am sure Birdy's is the last small venue we will see them play in Indianapolis. If word of mouth is anything, these guys will spread like wild fire. B

Measuring your worth by Google...

2004-01-27T14:10:00.000-05:00

It started out as a hobby, now blogging is a full blown obsession. I can understand why it is so popular. At various times in my life I have experimented with having a journal but that never could really keep my interest. Plus it is no fun if no one else reads it. I think Matt said it best when describing my blog to a buddy of ours. He said "It's Byron's brain in text form". I could not agree more. Unfortunately I have gotten sucked into something I did not know was possible, a web popularity contest of sorts. In an effort to spread the word of Byron (please excuse all Jesus references...) I have been obsessed with tracking page hits and worse, my Google PageRank. When you install the google tool bar every page you visit shows a rank from 0 to 10 (yes 0 is possible). This is Google's estimation of the page's worth. I (In The Congo) rank a lowly one out of ten. Congrats to Proximity for ranking two out of ten. Hopefully one day this will increase. I have two goals, spread the word of the blog and increase my PageRank. I need a real hobby, I know this. I was pleased to find out that I am googleable now though. If you search for "Byron Schaller" on google I get four hits, all of which are actually me. Get excited. I am officially part of the World Wide Web. How do the rest of you rank? B

The Ghosts of Speeches Past...

2004-01-26T10:39:00.000-05:00

Six days ago we all tuned in to hear President George W Bush give his fourth State of the Union address. It is pretty easy to tell by what I wrote earlier that I was not impressed. In fact the speech was so bad that I have been unable to stop thinking about it and how it should be a wake up call to a half asleep nation. This speech stands as the antithesis of what a rallying call should be. When I think of great speeches and the effect they can have, I fell that we were all short changed by this presidency. If GW is going to do unspeakable things in our name he can at least speak about them with grace and elegance. But that has never been his forte has it. His speeches have given us "The Axis of Evil", the sixteen words, and a hard fight against steroid use in pro sports. I am not quite sure what the last one has to do with the State of the Union at all. In all this doom and gloom I have jumped into the Way Back machine know as the Internet and looked up some speeches that were truly moving. William Jefferson Clinton and John Fitzgerald Kennedy were two of the greatest presidential orators this country has ever know. They will forever stand with the likes of Lincoln, Roosevelt, Washington, and Franklin as some of the best we have had. Here is some of what Clinton had to say in his 1997 State of the Union address: "America is far more than a place. It is an idea, the most powerful idea in the history of nations. And all of us in this Chamber, we are now the bearers of that idea, leading a great people into a new world. A child born tonight will have almost no memory of the 20th century. Everything that child will know about America will be because of what we do now to build a new century." That is truly moving. Here is what JFK had to say in his first State if the Union in 1961: "I am confident that that friendship will continue. Our Constitution wisely assigns both joint and separate roles to each branch of the government; and a President and a Congress who hold each other in mutual respect will neither permit nor attempt any trespass. For my part, I shall withhold from neither the Congress nor the people any fact or report, past, present, or future, which is necessary for an informed judgment of our conduct and hazards. I shall neither shift the burden of executive decisions to the Congress, nor avoid responsibility for the outcome of those decisions." Those are great words of partnership and responsibility. I long for the days when the commander and chief could move all Americans to action for the common good and not be mocked for his "strategery". In these coming days I will be paying close attention to these primary candidates and watching for greatness through speech. We need a president who can move a stagnant nation to the greatness it is capable of, through action not fear. I have gotten in to a bad habit of caring about politics and national discourse. I at least want what I watch to be moving. If that means sounding a barbaric yawp over the rooftops of the world, so be it. B

New Gaping Void Cartoons...

2004-01-26T09:01:00.000-05:00

More at Gapingvoid.com.

Shiver Me Timbers!

2004-01-23T11:20:00.000-05:00

Shiver me timbers you know loads about pirate
vocabulary matey so Splice the Mainbrace and
celebrate!yoho!{please vote}
pirate vocabulary
brought to you by Quizilla

Thanks Ali for a great Friday Quiz! I could work at Championship as well. Check out this quiz. You all do know my love for pirates! I think I need to remember this site for this year's "Talk Like a Pirate Day". If there is one thing I love more than pirates it is random obscure holidays. I wonder if Michelle Branch will be impresses with my pirate vocab knowledge... B

Brooklyn, WHAT!

2004-01-23T09:40:00.000-05:00

Apparently I have been misunderstood. My creative endeavor to discover new depths in Warren G. was a half jest and half a nod to the old school. By old school I mean CYO dances. Being Catholic comes with all kinds of things. You get indoctrinated 1 to 6 times a week about the church. Your parents will probably want you to take Latin. But best of all you get CYO dances. The Catholic Youth Organization puts on these mid-day and sometimes, when you get older, at night, dances. Being at the height of the early 90's we heard a lot of Warren G., Cranberries, and Violent Femmes. To the mind of the twelve year old Warren G. and Paperboy are pretty dope. Plus they have a good beat that your plaid-skirted classmates enjoy shaking it to. That right there is a selling point. Had I been the hep cat that I am now, I would have made requests for some Tribe or Digable Planets. But alas I was not always this cool. Had I been, I could have been the kid that threw his hands in the air when the bass dropped yelling "Brooklyn WHAT!" and represent for my brothers back on the east coast... B

G-funk on a whole new level...

2004-01-22T15:18:00.000-05:00

In the infinite boredom that is my day job I have been pondering the eternal question: "How can I keep it real like Warren G?" I know that I am blessed to have a job that allows me time to ponder such important issues. Second only to Paper Boy in shear genius and inspiration, Warren is a pioneer. Because of him I learned it was cool say "Mount Up!". I also learned what exactly to do when trying to pick up the ladies (read as "gang of hoes") or what to do when you see your homie "end-up". I would be remiss in not also thanking Nate Dogg. Although I do want a public apology for his later work. I don't quite see my self as a "regulator" and I don't think I can impact the level of G-funk. Personally I will try to do for blogging what Warren did for G-funk. I have begun to toy with Movable Type. We will see to what extent I can elevate this art form... B

Happy New Year!

2004-01-22T09:30:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year everyone and welcome to the Year of the Monkey! I was born in the Year of the Monkey myself, which I think makes a lot of sense. I would like to give a shout out to all the new monkeys coming onboard this year. The Lunar New Year is one of those great holidays that proves the Universe does not revolve around the USA. I would like to invite you all to share this holiday with me by going to your local Chinese restaurant and checking out those cool zodiac placemats before your food comes. If your choice is a buffet please read the placemat first anyway. Please enjoy learning about a whole new set of sky animals that have absolutely nothing to do with your life. They always say two sets are better than one. Woo hoo, I love being a crab and a monkey. It's just so versatile. Just remember the next time someone asks you what your sign is, tell them both. B

News Flash: Dick Cheney Is Alive!

2004-01-21T09:14:00.000-05:00

People of America be not afraid! I know that you all thought, much like me, that the Vice President had died some months ago. This is the only possible reason why no one has seen him. However, last night during the State of the Union address a very much alive Dick Cheney sat behind our beloved and fearless leader. Okay , now on the serious part of the post. Last night I had the pleasure of watching President Bush's State of the Union Address. For those of you who had better things to do let me explain. There are two things that really define the State of the Union Address. The first is the President making a speech. The second and far more obvious is way too damn much clapping. One thing I have noticed over the years is the applause during the speech is very interesting to watch. It has it's own dynamics and subtleties. First you have the congressmen and senators of the incumbent president. They clap like hapless idiots after every second sentence. This is quite annoying. Then you have the opposing side. They almost never clap. They did clap last night after Bush said two things: "Key provisions of the Patriot Act are set to expire next year." and "The tax reductions you passed are set to expire". I found this most humorous. Next you have the Supreme Court Justices. They never even blink much less clap. And last you have invited guests like Tom Brady. He just sat and wondered what the fuck he was doing there. The speech made no mention of space exploration and carried the same Bush rhetoric as always. There was a bunch of "we did good in Iraq", "the economy is really ok", and "seniors won't die now because of prescriptions". There was also a bunch of "everyone is equal in God's eyes, but straight people are more equal", "motherfuckers best recognize or we will blow their shit up", and "there have been no attacks since September 11th so I will say September 11th as much as possible". Ok so that is a bit of paraphrasing, but you get the point. If you really want to read or see the speech visit the link above. Kerry's response afterwards with Tom Brokaw was nice and low key, he did make a point to say Bush was wrong a lot. I like that. As if an article about the State of the Union could not get funnier, take a look at what I found on the web while looking for pictures and transcripts. On the whitehouse.gov page their is link to Laura Bush's recipes. How funny is that. The "Cowboy Cookies" are my favorite. Proof once again that Bush likes his women in the kitchen. What were your impressions of the speech? B

Review: Old 97's at The Vogue Indianapolis, Indiana

2004-01-20T14:10:00.000-05:00

Last night Brie and I saw the Old 97's at The Vogue. I was really looking forward to this because the last time I saw them was when they opened up for Train and Matchbox 20. As if this was not bad enough I went with a super annoying girl who would not shut up. People who talk through an entire show are way worse than just seeing a shitty band. We arrived promptly when the doors opened at 7 and were able to snag a table and waitress, prime property at The Vogue. It was not very crowded and for a while it looked like no one was coming. A little after 8 The Damnwells from Brooklyn, NY took the stage. The lead guitarist had some serious hair and style issues but the music was a good solid 7/10. Not bad for an opening act. After about an hour set and a quick change Rhett and Co. took the stage. The third song they played was my favorite of theirs , "Lonely Holiday" off of Fight Songs. They played a great mix of old b-sides, singles, brand new songs, a Merle Haggard cover, and a song originally written for the Ranchero Brothers side project. After a nice long set Rhett came out and performed two off of his solo record. Much like when he opened for Tori Amos he tore through the songs playing them as fast as possible. I like the album version better. After that Murray played one of his solo more country than alt songs. The rest of the band then joined them for three more songs. Quite a long encore. All said and done we were out of their by a little after 11. Not bad for a full Monday of music. I enjoyed the band much more this time and hope that the next time Rhett is in town he brings Murray, Ken and Phil with him. Join the Reviewer's Corner next week for a look at Gomez. B

Kerry Wins...

2004-01-20T13:09:00.000-05:00

Welcome everyone to yet another exciting day in politics. Big news all around, from the big win for Sen. John Kerry (D MA), to GW's State of the Union Address. Although I do favor Howard Dean, I must say that all the excitement and big turn out last night are good signs. I am also pleased with Dick Gephardt's decision to drop. He was my least favorite. I was listening to a NPR this morning and a commentator said that with this big of a race and the top three contenders so close it could go all the way to the convention. This would give lots of free press to the Democrats and not give Bush the time he wants to attack one candidate early on in the campaign. This is good for voters. After being disillusioned for a while, this primary is really giving me hope. Although I still think the idea of Al Sharpton as president is real funny, I think whoever the Democrats decide to run will be at least a better choice and possibly a really good choice against Bush. I think the biggest bonus is the fact that the Democrats have much better blogs. You would think that the president could slide in some blogging time while running the free world. In completely unrelated news it is David Lynch's 54th birthday. Happy birthday David! Stay tuned for last night's show review...B

Conversations...

2004-01-19T13:30:00.000-05:00

Get excited everyone, I have been accepted into the BlogChat beta. This means that if I am online you can have a conversation with me right through the blog. Please give it a shot. Just visit the Congo Tribal Council link. If you want even more conversations check out Fresh Air and listen to some great interviews by Terri Gross. B

Happy Democracy Day!

2004-01-19T11:32:00.000-05:00

Today is truly a day to celebrate democracy. I would like to wish everyone a happy King Holiday and hope that you spend at least a little time today reflecting on what this means. Sure it is a day off school and work for some but I think we overlook the intentions of this day of observation and reflection. Today is truly a day to reflect on how far our young country has come and what we still have left to do. We have fought hard the battle against discrimination and hate, but the war is not yet over. I challenge everyone to step back for a couple of minutes today and think of what they can do in a small way to make us better. If I have any readers in Iowa, you guys have an extra special opportunity today. Today is the first primary election for the 2004 election. As you probably all know, we here in the Congo proudly support Howard Dean. If you would like to please vote for him, but also remember that the most important thing is just to VOTE! Voting is not only fun but it also buys you the right to bitch for the next 4 years. So when you have some time today reflect on the importance of today's events, I know I will. P.S. Who do you want to win the caucus in Iowa? Let me know I will keep a tally. B

Worst Christmas Ever...

2004-01-18T19:42:00.000-05:00

Today when I woke up I got into the shower. At least I thought it was the shower. I think that although I was cleaned by water and soap, it was in fact Mr. Peabody's Way-back Machine. I was wisked back to 1994 and saw a Colts team from that era. Four intersecptions and a fumble as well as well horrible officiating led to the demise of the Colts. After close watching all year this was not the team I knew. They played outside in the cold and snow, but I can not blame what happened on the weather. I don't know why they fell apart but I will look forward to the next season. I hope the jersey I bought, the first sports paraphenalia I have owned, will not go to waste. With all this said, I would like to thanks them all for a great season and I look forward to a good one next year. B

Fair and Balanced...

2004-01-16T13:43:00.000-05:00

I would like to welcome back our friends at Proxmity. It has been a while. Now, on to the story. Yesterday I had to take my car into the shop to repair an ignition coil. I was in the waiting room and had nothing better to do than watch the television which was conveniently set on Fox News. Normally I would never watch Fox News but I decided it was better than looking at the floor. I found it rather humorous that apparently Fox News has the new slogan: "Fair and Balanced". Wow. If there are two things that Fox News is not it is definitely fair and balanced. Now granted Rupert Murdoch is no Elliot Carver he is not the nicest guy either. Liberals and the Left should love Fox News. When everyone says that the media is liberal all you have to do is watch Fox report on the war in Iraq and boom (no pun intended) you can prove it is not liberal. In fact I even got the idea to post the constant Terror Alert Level from them. I hope everyone in Nebraska knows we are on "Yellow". However, I think they would only care if aliens making crop circles were on a watch list. All of this really culminated when I saw this cartoon on my Great Thompson Hunt. There was a time were being a journalist was noble, even respectable. Now you are in league with Mr. Rivera and his ilk. I just love how he smiles when talking about dead people. The sad thing is, he is immortal. No enemy of the USA would ever kill Geraldo, they would be doing America a favor. I still can't see how people can take this guy seriously. I mean at least Wolf Blitzer looks respectable even though he may not be much better. With all the propaganda on cable news I am glad we have the net where we can come and get our propaganda is nice written bloggy format. No one ever said we had a right to be propaganda free, but at least we can choose which stuff we want to consume. I guess that's a little better than Communism. B

A day that shall live in infamy...

2004-01-15T19:36:00.000-05:00

It is a dark, dark day. JP Morgan Chase and Bank One are merging. GW is peddling his new Moon and Mars plans. Mad cow disease is upon us. Any of these three things by themselves could signal the end of the world, but it gets worse. According to khfan.com the love of my life, Katie Holmes, is engaged. After all that pining she goes and shacks up with the guy who plays Oz in American Pie. Of course she is not married yet. There still is precious little time for me to convince her that I am Mr. Right. Part of me is truly upset and part of me wants to just move on to Michele Branch. I could learn to love Hotel Paper. Okay maybe not. I have done it all wrong. Instead of taking computer classes I should have taken Jazz choir. I can sing James Taylor damnit! B

A Free Man In Paris

2004-01-15T19:15:00.000-05:00

As promised, albeit a little late, here is my review of David Sedaris' Me Talk Pretty One Day. For some reason unbeknownst to me, I keep reading books by gay men (I still maintain that Salinger is gay too). Apparently gay people have the special ability to make self deprecation really humorous. There were a number of times when reading this that I laughed out load. Seriously funny. The book is divided in to two sections aptly named "One" and "Deux". "One" is various stories from him life here in the states. "Deux" is about his life as an "ex-pat" living in France. One particularly funny part was when he was talking about his French class in France trying to explain Easter to a Muslim who had never heard of it. It involved funny translations like "Jesus tied to two morsels of lumber". His stories about Amy are hysterical. Apparently one day when getting off the El in Chicago she yelled back at him "Good luck beating that rape charge!" for no good reason. I really enjoyed this book and strongly recommend it. Now I am on to read the definitely less funny No Logo by Naomi Klein. Being not humor and thicker, this might take some time. Check back later for the news of the day update. B

Is there a doctor in the house?

2004-01-14T09:42:00.000-05:00

Learning, I have decided, is an interesting and slow process. I think that this blog demonstrates that axiom rather well. My skills at HTML were completely nonexistent when I started but are getting better. As you can probably tell I have learned about post titles, how to float pictures, and even some nifty font tricks. Although not my primary reason for starting the blog, I guess becoming proficient at writing code isn't a bad thing. My main reason for wanting to flood the Internet with the never ending monologue that is in my head is to improve my writing. I you can tell by the last sentence, I have a ways to go. I haven't quite grasped the whole comma thing yet, but I am trying. I guess this goes back to the being a college drop out and opening one grammar book in my life. If you want to know how to conjugate verbs in Latin, French, or German I am your man. If you want to know were commas go I am no help. I still throw them around for the hell for it and hope people get the point but I really haven't a clue.
I have wanted to write a long time and just never got around to it. This is much the same with my desire to become a ninja. Hey if Chris Farley can do it, why not me? I want to be a bold and witty writer. Reading books by Michael Moore, David Sedaris, and Nick Hornby have fanned this flame. They are way better than me, but it is a nice goal. There is one other author that I think of when I think of being bold and witty. HST. Hunter Thompson has got to be one of the craziest and funniest people who was ever lived. What's better is he documents all of this craziness. The other day I was sitting over at Brie's apartment and was discussing how I needed to spread the word of the blog with her roommate Kate. Kate was surely joking when she said: "You should email Thompson". Some of you may know that HST writes for EPSN's website on their "Page 2" section. Kate was sure their would be a feedback email address for him. After thinking about it I said what the hell. I went to ESPN's site in search of HST's email address. Unfortunately I had not luck. I am now on a quest to find this address and see if I can convince the good doctor to read and comment on my site. This is my goal for 2003. However, if he does start to visit I should probably learn to write better. What do you think? Feel free to post on our nifty new commenting system. Their will be gold stars given to anyone who can either tell me how many commas are in the post versus how many are used correctly, or get me HST's email address. Happy hunting. Stay tuned later for a full review of Me Talk Pretty One Day. B

2004-01-13T15:28:00.000-05:00

Sex in the City...

In honor of the final season of Sex in the City and the events of last night I have decided to write my post Carrie Bradshaw style. The names except for Matt have been changed to protect the innocent and those not so as well.
Indianapolis is a fairly boring city. Things tend to pretty much stay the same. Sure there is always drama, but after a while it is all the same drama. This was not the case last night. When people think Monday the words danger and excitement do not so much come to mind. I'll start from the beginning. So my buddy Bill got a new a job so we decided to go out and have a guys-night-out to celebrate. Matt goes to Bill's apartment to meet him after he gets off work. Matt shows up and finds Bill and his friend Cindy. We are ready to go out and Matt asks Cindy if she would like to come too. She says sure. Bill has to make a quick stop before we go out so Cindy takes him while Matt picks me up at work. Matt also has Bill's cell phone so he can stay in touch being as Matt does not have one of his own. We are on our way to the bar to meet Bill and Cindy when Bill's fiance Veronica calls his cell phone. Matt sees this and answers it. Veronica asks if Bill is there and Matt says no he is with Cindy and they are going to meet us. Veronica is not please by such things and asks if Cindy was at the apartment and Matt being the honest man he is tells Veronica that she was. Now she is steamed. Matt hangs up and we carry on to the next block. Still not at the bar and Veronica calls me and asks if we are with Bill yet. I respond negative and she asks me to have him call her ASAP. We get to the bar the same time they do and proceed to have drinks and merriment. Veronica keeps calling Bill again and again. Around nine we make our way out of the bar and find Veronica has been waiting in her car with a friend. She gets out and confronts Bill, thanking him for lying to her. A long talk ensues while Matt and I just want to go to La Bambas for a burrito. Bill asks Matt and I to drop off Veronica and him at home. Matt agrees. The ride home is a very quiet one. We think that Bill had quite a talking to when he got home. By the way, Bill and Veronica are engaged. This brings me to my point. Why did Veronica feel the need to stake out the bar and have a confrontation with Bill? Why did she not just come inside and drag him out. Also, if this is how she is going to act why does Bill want to marry her? Bill can obviously not be himself so what is the point? Matt and I theorize that Veronica has some serious control issues. It is clear that she thinks Bill and Cindy are more than friends, why does she stay? All of these are good questions and I would like everyone's input. Let me know what you think. We now have a nifty new commenting system, feel free to use it. I would like to start a dialogue about marriage, fidelity, and control in relationships.
On a lighter and happier note, Matt is the proud recipient of the playa of the week award. Overnight he has gone from bachelor extraordinaire to the number one playa in his postal code. Way to go Matt. We here in the Congo salute you. As the old expression goes, when it rains it pours. It is about time to capitalize on that whole nice guy thing. Out of the three you should find one that can pass your tests. Best of luck. These are my two cents, where are yours? B

2004-01-12T11:54:00.000-05:00

Year of the Horse and Weekend of the Fish...

I would like to start off this week with hardy "GO COLTS!" I hope that everyone shared the pleasure that was watching The Colts carry out a victory over The Chiefs. AFC championship here we come! Aside from watching The Colts I had a fairly eventful weekend. On Friday I was eight dollars and seventy five cents of the fourteen and a half million that Big Fish raked in (enough to take the number one spot for RoTK). I very much enjoyed it. It is very much a guy movie. Not in the vain of blow everybody up with naked lesbians kinda guy movie, but in the father/son bonding kinda guy movie. I encourage all guys out there to grab their dad and check it out post haste. With a cast like Ewen McGregor, Albert Finney, and Billy Cudrup how can you go wrong. Add in Tim Burton and things get interesting. Although I still recommend going to see The Cooler first, check out this one as soon as possible. Later. B

2004-01-09T14:01:00.000-05:00

Proof that GW hates YOU!

This is so good, I could not have made it up if I tried. If there is one thing that I enjoy, it is watching the republicans do what they do best, playa hate. I know that many of you who read my blog listen to NPR, drive Volvos or similar cars, and vainly or not consider yourself part of the cultural elite. I now have proof that republicans, and especially old people, HATE YOU! Being the leftist pinko commie that I am, I subscribed to the Howard Dean email newsletter. Today the newsletter brought to light an anti-Dean ad that is running in Iowa right now. The ad is sponsored by The Club for Growth. Or as I call them, The Club of Fascist Fucks. Go to their site and watch the crazy old people in ad talk about Howard Dean. I will give you a few minutes, go check it out then come back for the discussion (read as me ranting).

Ok. Now that you are back, let's discuss this. First off let's start with "tax-hiking", a valid political argument, unsoundly based on the republican "fact" that all taxes are bad, but at least it is politically based. Next, "government-expanding", because Bush didn't create a whole new agency full of new red tape or anything. Enough said. Now the fun starts with "latte-drinking". Last I checked choice of caffeinated beverage had nothing to do with politics, but at least now we see where this is going. Even though Starbucks is evil, now if you drink French coffee drinks you might as well piss on the flag. Bring on the hate with "sushi-eating, Volvo-driving, New York Times-reading, body-piercing, Hollywood-loving" and my personal favorite: "left-wing freak show". Wow. Let's go down a list of things that make you a bad person: being a jap, driving a safe but expensive foreign car, being literate, having a tongue, lip, nose, eyebrow, or ear ring, and liking movies. I had no idea we were so evil. I mean while the crazy fascists are at it the might as well throw in "nigger-loving". That's right, I said it. This absolutely amazed me, but not as much as what I read next. The president of this group last month made the following statement: "What we're trying to show is Dean is supported by the cultural elite and not by anyone with middle-American values and finances." Personally I would want my country run by the cultural elite than by people who use "middle-American" values in place of bigotry. Bring back the Philosopher Kings and Warrior Poets.
When I see things like this, after the initial humor has subsided I left with a profound sense of fear and dread. It sounds so much like they have to be fucking kidding, that when you find out they are serious you can't believe it. Trust me, believe it. These people hate you. They want to crush your way of life, and for that matter all ways of life, except the one they decide. Election time is starting to heat up and this is the first, definitely not the last, time you will hear me say this: For the love of god, VOTE! Don't let these backwards fucks run our lives. Let me know what you think and your reactions. B

2004-01-08T17:19:00.000-05:00

The Joy of Great Character Acting...

Tom Hanks, Julia Roberts, and Freddie Prinze Jr. are all leading actors, yet rarely can carry a movie. Hollywood would not probably not exist and defiantly not make good movies if it were not for What's-His-Name. You all know What's-His-Name, that guy you see in a bunch of movies who plays some sidekick, or neighbor, or coworker. These guys and gals make a movie. They add depth and life to a film. One of these guys is William H. Macy (pictured above). You may know him from such films as Fargo, Mystery Men and about a billion others. Last night I had the sincere pleasure of see his new film where he gets to play a leading man, The Cooler. It combines all the right elements. I love films about Vegas, cheesy 70's porn/lounge music, great sex scenes, and Shawn Hatosy getting his ass kicked. The Cooler has all of this. Doug, a friend of Brie's, got us sneak peek tickets so we got to see it early for Indiana, it actually made it's debut at Sundance 2003. It is officially released tomorrow. All of you need to break your plans and check it out before it leaves the theater. It's funny, shocking, heart-breaking, and has loads of great sex. Plus you might learn something. I learned that when some one tells you that you have a great cock, the proper response is "Thank You". I would say if it is not in Oscar contention that there is no justice in the world, but then the Academy has proved that time and time again. Some of you may think that my endorsement was bought with the nifty The Cooler playing cards I got for free, but I assure you that this is a non-biased judgment. I know you are all chomping at the bit to see Big Fish, but hold off or the best option, make it a double feature night. I guarantee satisfaction. This film is why I watch movies. Best Film of 2003. B

2004-01-07T15:31:00.000-05:00

Class Wars...

I am not a class warrior. Ok, some people would argue against that and maybe they're right. I don't purposely hate rich people and actively try to "dethrone" them in some Marxist proletariat revolt. However, over the years I have developed an acute sense of class and for that matter, race. All though the two are mutually exclusive they do seem to go hand in hand in the great US of A. I am a very tolerant of every kind of person in the world except for bigots. I don't care if they are rednecks in hoods with confederate flags, rich people who patronize and condescend the less well off, or black people who want to kill "whitey". They really piss me off. Not to mention when you get into religious bigots like the good Catholic family that hates the "faggots" down the block. There is a special section of hell for those people no matter how many crackers they eat or prayers they pray.
This being said, you can see how when I was browsing the sociology section at Borders and came across a memoir about a white kid who grew up in the projects of the Lower East Side of Manhattan, I had to read it. Honky is this book. This is a must read. Conley discusses race and class in a way that is not only comical, but shows how America really operates. From the ghettos of Manhattan to the bigots of suburban Pennsylvania. I had never heard of this book and just randomly came across it, I am glad I picked it up. You should all go out, pick up a copy, and read it. After you are done reading it, read the dedication again. That really adds a nice touch to the end. I can't say enough good things about this book so I will leave it up to y'all to decide for yourself. As always, let me know what you think. B

2004-01-07T10:15:00.000-05:00

Learning to Live With Holden and Other Ghosts...

If I have learned one thing in my life so far, it is that everyone likes The Beatles and The Catcher in the Rye. I will continue to believe that everything The Beatles released before Rubber Soul is complete trash until the day I die. However I have decided that Salinger is worth a little more thought and meditation. It is not the fact that I want to like the book, I am just curious why everyone else does. Armed with my Little Brown paperback edition and a couple of hours, I decide to investigate. Here is what I found.
Being new to the "I read two books a week" club I am very picky, almost snobbish about prose. I found this to be a problem with Strip City and it was a definite issue here. The 1950's were a long time ago. In understand the whole period piece thing and how TCitR was banned for Holden saying "goddam" a lot. This was more boring than risque to me. I realize that if Salinger had used "fucking" instead of "goddam" and "like a motherfucker" instead of "like hell" it probably would not have rubbed me wrong. Since it was written half a century ago and I decided to let up on being a snob. I have let my prose objection go. That makes the book easier to like for sure.
However there was still this problem of Holden Caulfield. The problem was people, and a lot of them at that, kept telling me how they liked Holden and how they could empathize and relate to him. Now had this been some random Beatles loving people I could understand their poor taste and just move on. The problem was I liked and respected these people. I not sure if it was for their sake or mine, but I had to unravel this mystery. After a lot of thought and couple trips down memory lane this is what I came up with. I am not Holden Caulfield. A quick side not: If you want to watch a movie about a poor schmuck who thinks he is check out Chasing Holden. It stars DJ Qualls from The New Guy and cheetah skinning fame. By the way, it is terrible. Like I said before, I am not Holden Caulfield, but I was, kinda. In my quest to become to delightful, well-adjusted young professional that I am today, I am just a wee bit guilty of sweeping my past into a nice dusty closet with a very thick door.
Let me just start by saying the fact that I graduated high school has got to be something close to a miracle. I am still not quite sure how I pulled that off. I think they passed me out of pity or something. It is not that I did poor work, I did no work. And as most of you know, college was not for me. I do regret this decision (or lack there of) because I think I would have enjoyed it. I never went on an extended weekend hiatus around Manhattan or even ice skating at Radio City, but I do remember ditching out for a day or two at times, or at the very least threatening it. I was also not always the suave and debonair fellow you know today. Although I never wore a hunting hat, peak to the back, or had a run in first hand with a prostitute, I do remember being a 17 year old kid wearing a Sarah McLaughlin t-shirt and thinking that somehow this made me cool and I should get all the ladies. Even though it did work out one time (with that shirt), I was far from a lady killer. If you want to go back to the days of middle school it gets much worse. The thought of most of that time stills makes me shudder with intense embarassment. The Byron of today is not the Byron of yesteryear. For those of you who knew me then all I can say is sorry and thanks for sticking around. Relating to Holden is something I didn't really want to do, but I guess it is the truth. I should probably thank him for saving me years of regression therapy. I guess this proves my theory that reading is some scary shit. I am too deep in it now to stop so I might as well ride this one out.
I finished Honky last night and a review and discussion is probably going to be posted tomorrow or later today if I get bored. I also started to read Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris. Diving right back into my own past. I will off a full review when I am done probably early next week or late this week. I do have to comment on the first chapter though. It is about how he had to take speech therapy as a child in elementary school. Most of you have no idea what I am talking about so I will explain. Speech Therapy is where they teach you to speak normal. In Sedaris' case he had a lisp in my case I could barely fucking speak. I stutter. In case you missed that, I s-s-s-s-s-stutter. It is probably the worst affliction in the world next to gangrene or herpes or something. I have come along way and most people I know don't know this about me. I still do it. If you think that public speaking is hard when you have glossophobia, try not even being able to get a "goddam" word out. It was nice that someone else knew what having a "special" session that dragged you out of class to read kindergarden books is like. Maybe one day I'll write a humorous account of my childhood to teach and entertain others. However, before I start that I have a few issues I still have to work through myself. Sedaris also tells this story with great humor and self deprecation. I am sure I will enjoy this book and the whole reading thing in general. Look for the Honky post soon. B

2004-01-06T13:04:00.000-05:00

Down at Ye Olde Pub...

The holidays are finally at an end. Nothing really settles this like the first Tuesday back to work after a long break. I decided to approach this return to the old at the beginning of the new year by integrating a little old and new myself. First off, the new. I am no longer the shaggy beast of a man that most of you saw over the holiday. I am now all shorn a proper with my new haircut. I kind of makes me look like one of those peg people you played with when you were younger, but without the round hole instead of legs. I think of this as a positive change for no other reason than it is something new and interesting, I am sure the charm will wear off soon. It also looks like a great week to see a movie, I have two on the list: Big Fish and The Cooler. Big Fish is the latest work from everyone's favorite gothic millionaire, Tim Burton. It tells the story of a man who in turns tells the story of his father's life. The catch is he is unable to separate the fact from the fiction. Watch the preview and read the reviews. It looks very cool. The Cooler, on the other hand, is a much smaller venture. It is the story of a gambler with wicked bad luck in Vegas. It received very warm reviews at Sundance and stars William H. Macy. This will either be enough to convince you to go see it on Friday when it comes out or never think of it again. Hopefully the former.
Now with all the newness in 2004, it is nice to get back to some of the oldness as well. This is the first week since before Christmas that I will be able to take back up my weekly dart game with my father on Tuesday and make my Thursday evening appearance at the Ale Emporium. Two traditions that I do miss. It looks like a week of drinking and art film. God I hate that. Pretty soon I will feel just like Bill Murray in Groundhog's Day again, but for now it nice that the old is not so old right now.
On a completely unrelated note. I finished Catcher in the Rye on Sunday. I was a good solid 2 out of 5. I know that some people swear by this book, but I can't figure out why. If any of you have some answers, let me know. For now I hope you are eagerly awaiting the review of Honkey. Cheers. B

2004-01-05T15:12:00.000-05:00

Generational Crisis...

I am a man without a country. Actually I have a country, it is a generation that I am lacking. Being born in the middle of 1980 on a warm summer day, during the rise of the Reganite regime, I am a cultural misfit. I have devised a little way to make this clear. Answer the following four questions. If you select the first answer you get a point. If you select the later you get no points. Question 1: Which movie do you better identify with (and has a better soundtrack), Singles or The Fast and the Furious? Question 2: Fill in the blank. When I grow up I want to be: Eddie Vedder or Fred Durzt. Question 3: Which were you most likely seen dressed in high school, flannel shirt and ripped jeans or chic designer wear you saw on TRL? Which would you rather watch on MTV: 120 Minutes and YO! MTV Raps or Jackass and Viva la Bam!? I score a 4. Which I hope you all do too... But that's beside the point. I clearly belong in Generation X and I am born on the cutoff year for statistics. If you got a zero, by the way, you are Generation Y ( as in, Y have you not killed yourself yet and done us all a favor...). I don't quite get it. I clearly feel a kinship with fellow Xers even though I almost consider myself a touch too young. I guess that could explain why I have almost always hung with older people or just snobs like me. Maybe I heard the sounds of Grunge just soon enough to be have my soul saved from the post-grunge fall out. I mean, what the fuck happened. In 1992 No Doubt was a ska band opening for Sublime is the LBC, and Jewel was a homeless Alaskan trying to make it through music. Now Jewel has sold her soul to product placement and is proud of it and Gwen is about to go solo with a hip album with "touches of r&b". "TOUCHES OF R&B" !!!!! WHAT THE FUCK!!!!! It's ok, like I say on The One Two One Giga, I never liked the bitch anyway. As much as I want to hate the little Vin Diesel wannabes wearing their red Yankees hats and slamming to rocked up gay men (read as George Michael), I can't. It's not their fault. The fault lies squarely on the fucking baby boomers. Let's face it, they lost the Gen-X battle. For those us who actually wanted an "Alternative" the jamband and inde-rock culture took to the sky. Without radio play and big labels we actually got, and still do get, good music. Corporate America lost. The baby boomers lost. They were down but not out. They decided that our younger siblings and even some of our kids were going to be under their control. The stepped up their game. They recruited and polished "inde" kids to lead the way and then dumped more sugar covered plastic into out music stores than Wonka has plastic covered sugar. A sure sign that it is not just the baby boomers, but the corporations as well can be summed up in two words: Paris Hilton. She is the mermaid on the bow of corporate America's ship. She is leading the charge, and she is too dumb to fucking know it. She makes it cool to be a corporate mogul. John Rockefeller eat your heart out, you don't have shit on Paris Hilton. This, in a nut shell, is why I get so pissed about the thought of being grouped with a whole generation that didn't have a fucking chance. Yet I still feel a little too young to have been at the Lollapalooza '92 show where Eddie Vedder was skateboarding around the venue because nobody knew who the fuck he was. I feel torn so I guess I will just have to brave my own way at the tail end of what could have saved all those youngsters. Our parents had The Who to talk about their generation. Who did they give us? Brittany fucking Spears. Gee, Thanks. With all this it is no fucking wonder that W is in the White House. Tell me what you think and how you did on the quiz. Later. B

2004-01-05T08:29:00.000-05:00

New Gaping Void Cartoons Posted

More Toons...

More to come later in the day...

2003-12-31T13:18:00.000-05:00

What Dreams May Come and Other Such Nonsense

... And all of my time fears are turning my days into daymares
And I live daymares reliving nightmares
of what taunted my past...
-Saul Williams, Sha Clack-Clack

Your thoughts may be your own, but your dreams are not. The origin of dreams is a great mystery to people. Humans have spent centuries trying to interpret them and make sense of the after hours mind wanderings. After last night I want none of that. Saying I am a vivid dreamer is like saying Christina Aguilera is a little slutty, a massive understatement. When people tell me that they do not dream or that they don't remember their dreams, I don't understand. I dream in full color, 3-D, complete story arcs, and scene changes that make taking drugs in Requiem for a Dream look slow. I am used to this. It has been this way all my life. Last night was a completely over the fucking top. I woke up exhausted after seven hours of sleep and completely wigged the fuck out. I could try and explain it. In fact I even thought starting a separate blog just as a dream journal. I have decided this is not a good idea. Don't get me wrong, but if I am freaked out, I don't even know what other people will think. You won't get the full picture but I will try and provide a brief overview. It starts out with me and 5 or so friends who were familiar in the dream but not reality and I moving to South Carolina and doing some work as a team on the water. The details of that a little fuzzy right now, but it's not terribly important. I do remember meeting a girl that we all hung out with too. Then it cuts to what I think is the Manhattan ghetto. It centers around a neighborhood with a bar and a couple of project-like apartments. The main cast if you will is a large group of hooligans, skaters, punks, and what have you. There is also a small segment of preppy people too because it is apparently cool to live here or something. All I know is I am not from here. And I am here because I am with some girl who is actually with some other guy who is abusive and a total loser. The craziness comes at the bar when a fight breaks out with loser guy and one of the punk and gets carried out to the streets and turns into a fucking riot. Something on the order of Do the Right Thing sans pizza joint. This goes on for a while and really graphic. Disturbingly graphic. All of this is going on and I am at the going with the random girl back to her hole in the wall apartment and then her loser boyfriend guy comes there and breaks down the door and more fighting insues. And in the middle of these scenes there are random sex scenes too for what I am sure is no good reason. And then sometime a little later I wake up asking myself what the fuck just happened. I know that I have not been able to remotely do it justice but it was fucking whack. I have no idea where this came from. It might have been the combination of legal amphetamines, beer, and the fact that I just started reading Catcher in the Rye. Who the fuck knows. If somebody could shed light on this and why my dreams are so fucked up, I'm all ears. Now on a much lighter note. I found the most randomly cool thing on the web today, mail order real pet penguins. Penguin Warehouse will ship you your very own pet penguin of your choice for the low, low price of 1500 to 2500 dollars. You should check this site out it is almost too strange to believe. My favorite is how they ship them. I hope I have not rambled on too long today. I wish everyone a happy New Year and I will talk to you all again in 2004. Cheers. B

2003-12-30T14:05:00.000-05:00

Guilty Pleasures

Two posts in one day! I must be really getting into this whole blogging thing. I do, however, have an explanation. You see I picture myself as circa 1962 feature writer for your hometown paper who drowns himself in whiskey at the local pub on 3rd and Chestnut while brainstorming about his next feature topic. The other day I was brainstorming, not so much in a whiskey haze as in my car, and I came up with a lot of good ideas for posts. With Christmas and book and movie reviews getting in the way I have not had time to blog about them. So I have decided to hell with it, I am posting this anyway. I kinda got this idea from Group Hug when I saw their motto: "The only people who really know me are about a million strangers". Now I have to be somewhat modest and assume that very few if any strangers read my blog (Spread the Word!) and that my dear friends are the only ones who come here to either enjoy my ramblings or silently mock me. One thing I really do enjoy about the whole blogging process is comments. I have decided that I wanted to write a post about my guilty pleasures in hopes that others with comment and either anonymously or proudly post theirs as well. Sounds fun to me. Most of you already know my number one guilty pleasure: Dawson's Creek. Or in a broader sense, the WB in general. Now don't get me wrong, I am no Sabrina or Rita fan. However I have been known to watch an episode or two of Everwood, Smallville, or dare it say it Gilmore Girls (dude, Lorelei is hot). I guess there is just something wrong in my head that I drawn to cheesy teenage shows, but God damn it they are entertaining. Now I know the normal thing to do is step back and say that they are only entertaining because the girls are hot, which is true. But I will go one step further and admit some of the plots are even good too. I know, I know, I have stepped over the line on this one. But in the name of journalistic integrity it must be done. See, I have gone out on a limb and shared my deep, dark secrets. Time for you all to play along. It is way more fun if we all mock each other. Beeler, Jon from Boston, I expect comments from both of you. If you want to extend the fun go to Google and search for "Guilty Pleasures", apparently I am not the first to blog about it. Please enjoy the communal mocking, God knows I will. Also on a completely unrelated note the picture for this post is from a man named Hugh Macleod who does art on the back of business cards. You can find more at his site Gaping Void. You can also expect a fresh new card posted every week. Until tomorrow, or later today, have fun confessing your deep dark secrets to my alter ego, Father O'Flanagan. B

2003-12-30T09:11:00.000-05:00

Review: Lily Burana's Strip City

In my voyage to become a Bookslut, I have been reading quite a lot lately. My latest adventure into the literary world has been Strip City. Strip City is the memoir of Lily Burana, a former exotic dancer, who on upon deciding to settle down and get married, has a sudden urge to revisit her former life to reconcile her demons. As an added bonus she decides to take us along with her by documenting her travels. I must admit that when I first picked up the book, I expected some shocking expose by an "I have no regrets, take me as I am or fuck you.." kind of stripper. This was not the case. I must also admit that ever since the first time I was taken to a strip club I have found them most strange. I mean that in just about every way possible. It is a strange mix of a testosterone-driven urge to see naked women, a sense of feeling sorry for the exploited girls, a wonder at either the strength or resign the girls must have, and a sense of honesty about the whole experience. The last one may be surprising to some of you, but I still say that a strip club, next to a casino, is one of the most honest places you can find. Reading Strip City gave me some new insight into a world which I don't think I am fully capable of understanding. Burana does a good job a humanizing her story and experience. She tells about girls who fall into convenient stripper stereotypes of single-mom and uber-feminist, but she also goes beyond some of these same old cliches. One of the only issues I had with the book was her word choice in the prose. It is a good story and a moving one as well, but she seems to try a little to hard sometimes. I don't know who she is trying to prove herself to, herself or the reader, but when you use words like "Faustian" or "somabulatory" and "pussy" in the same sentence it just seems kind of out of place. If you can get past her high-brow literary references and need for words longer than ten letters, you actually do get a good story. Aside from a little insight into a subculture that none of us will experience first hand, you are able to relate to one lesson at least: The past is not a tourist destination. If you really want to go back a relive the past, you must be prepared to deal with everything that goes with it. This book makes that point as well as the character of Rob Gordon does in High Fidelity when he decides to call all of his old girlfriends. This is a dangerous road and one that is to be taken with caution. All that said, I found this book an enjoyable read and would recommend it. If you have some hang up about exotic dancing and are turned off by that, you should read this book even more. These girls are the ones that have fallen through the cracks, shining a little light on them is a good thing. B

2003-12-29T09:13:00.000-05:00

Holiday on Ice

First off, I would like to thank David Sedaris for the title. I would like to think myself more creative, however I just don't think I can find a title more fitting. So here we are at the onset of week two of the winter holiday extravaganza. Week one sure was interesting. First off I would everyone had a merry Christmas. Mine was spent with my family all day Wednesday and most of the day on Thursday. I decided that I was going to go listless this year and only make minor suggestions for gifts. This actually worked out better than I expected, I was actually surprised on Christmas morning. This was added to the already pleasing 11:30 at which we began to unwrap presents. All in all not bad. After more time with the fam, I hooked up with Brie and we went to go see the new Peter Pan movie. The visual effects of the movie were entertaining, but the plot was pretty much nothing new. It was the exact same Peter Pan story with no new twists or insights. As Gus Van Sant has taught us: The only thing worse than fucking up a perfectly good movie/story by making changes, is to make it exactly the same. On Friday is when the real celebrations start sounding off. After being out till 3 in the morning on Friday, 5 AM on Saturday, and not falling asleep until 4 AM last night my sleep patterns are completely messed up. However it was really to see everyone and enjoy some holiday merriment. I am sure this week will entail much more merriment. I am now going to pass out under my desk. Hope you all have a fun Monday as well. B.

2003-12-23T09:46:00.000-05:00

Orange you glad I didn't say Banana!

One may ask themselves: "What does a music snob listen to to get into the holiday spirit?" I assure it is not Jim Brickman or anything on the Windam Hill collection or for that matter the RuPaul Christmas album. I must admit I have heard all of these way too damn much. But I guess that is what you get when you work in a mall music store during Christmas and your manager happens to be the most flamboyantly gay man since Liberace. No, for a music snob like me there is only ONE Christmas album: The Vince Guaraldi Trio's A Charlie Brown Christmas. I have always hated Christmas music, mainly because I found it trite, tacky, and for the most part just bad. However the artful jazz of this album is really good. For the first time an off-key children's choir sounds oddly charming and soothing. It almost sounds how sitting by a fireplace drinking hot coco staring at stockings hanging over slow burning coals feels. That is no small accomplishment. However with Christmas there always is a Grinch. My Grinch of 2003 award is a tie between GW and his buddy Tom Ridge. Nothing gets people in the holiday spirit like raising the "Terror Alert" level to Orange. I still don't fully understand the "Terror Alert" levels being as the number of terror attacks under Orange that we have had are the same as every other level: Zero. For probably the first time in your life you can get on plane for your holiday trip and simultaneously dream of grandma's homemade gingerbread and worry about becoming a Kamikaze Death Missile. I say this is nonsense. My fellow Americans I urge you to go on with your lives and aside from more pestering at the airport, don't give the Orange nonsense another thought. I recommend everybody go out and get themselves a Christmas cookie and throw on the smooth sounds of Vince Guaraldi and enjoy your holiday. B

2003-12-22T10:40:00.000-05:00

Life with the Finches

For the first time in a long while I actually read an entire book from cover to cover in under 2 weeks. This is an amazing accomplishment for me. For those of you who do not know, I have ADHD rather bad. Even if you did not know, this probably does not come as much of a surprise. About a month ago I started taking meds for it and it is going great. I think this is what led me to be able to actually get through a book. I liked being able to read so much I am already half way through another right now. The book I read is Running with Scissors by Augusten Burroughs. The book is a memoir of his childhood. This is one of the craziest stories I have ever read or watched. The sheer fact that this guy survived his childhood is nothing short of amazing. This book is full of very black comedy, this that are so absurd and disturbing that all you can do is laugh. I won't go through details of the book save for two things. The first is that young Augusten's first sexual relationship is with his mother's therapist's 33 year old "adopted" son. The second is the therapist's family, the Finches (by who Augusten eventually gets adopted), bible-dip all the time. Since this concept was new to me too, I will explain it. Bible-dipping is basically like a cross between talking to God and a Magic 8 Ball. What you do is ask God a question, then open a bible to a random page, and then with out looking you put your finger on a random word. That word is you answer. I thought that was real funny. I am also half tempted to try it. I highly recommend this book as it is a very entertaining read. After finishing Running With Scissors I have started reading Strip City by Lily Burana. Expect a review of this soon. B

2003-12-19T09:22:00.000-05:00

Real quick quiz
I thought this was kinda funny. Since postmodern is my least favorite word, I think it makes absolutly no sense, I decided to take this quiz. Check it out:

You are a Theory Slut. The true elite of the
postmodernists, you collect avant-garde
Indonesian hiphop compilations and eat journal
articles for breakfast. You positively live
for theory. It really doesn't matter what
kind, as long as the words are big and the
paragraph breaks few and far between.

What kind of postmodernist are you!?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-12-19T08:53:00.000-05:00

I'm not a player, I just blog a lot

I thought this title would be appropriate for my first full week of blog entries. Get excited, I know I am. So last night I was attempting to do all of my Christmas shopping in one evening and get it done. I almost succeeded but I still have one more store to visit. Although I did make it to my favorite store in the whole world, Borders. I have a real problem with Borders in that I can not enter the store with out buying something, usually many somethings. Yesterday I was fairly good, I only bought two things and I saw them both right as I entered the store. The first book I bought was A Right to be Hostile a compilation of Aaron McGruder's Boondocks comic strip. I think this is one of the funniest and most socially conscience strips around. You have great lines like Huey telling an elderly white woman who calls him "cute": "I am no one's Pet Negro!" I try to read the strip everyday on Okay Player. Y'all should totally give it a shot. The second thing I was forced to buy was the January issue of Maxim. It just happened to have Michelle Branche on the cover. Now while I can not stand her music, I am secretly in love with her. Along with some really great pictures there was also some equally interesting facts in the interview that will help me get Miss Branche. I found out that apparently she has a pirate fetish! Aside from saying "Yar!" all the time, I also has a pirate for Halloween so I already have the outfit. At long last the impossible may be possible... This may also explain why Brie has such a deep hatred for her. It's ok though I know she is secretly in love with Ben Gibbard and Issac Brock...

2003-12-18T09:48:00.000-05:00

The obligatory Return of the King review

Last night as planned Brie, Teddy, Jean and I went and saw Return of the King. I am sure that you all will be shocked to know that it rocked. At three and a half hours long epic is almost an understatement. If you have read the book there are no suprises here. Even if you have not it is pretty easy to guess what happens. Once again the special effects are amazing and completely seamless. Gollum is totally believable as a real character. Minas Tirith is also very impressive. Much like the Matrix trilogy you have a serious ramping up effect in the LOTR trilogy. In The Fellowship of the Ring you have one troll, now you have a whole bunch of trolls. The battle for Helmsdeep was impressive but it pales in comparison to the battle of Minas Tirith. Peter Jackson has really out done himself. I liked him back in day when he was making trashy horror flicks and interesting films like Heavenly Creatures and Meet the Feebles. He really has come along way. If you live under a rock and have not seen the trailer or just want to check it out again here is the link. Hope you all enjoy it. If you have seen it let me know what you think. B

2003-12-17T16:53:00.000-05:00

It's like Christmas everyday!

The best part about having a large record collection is that every now and then you look through it and find something you totally forgot about. That happened to me a couple days ago when I was flipping my copious CD collection and came across Sunny Day Real Estate's Diary. I blew the dust off it, jumped into the way-back machine, and set the dial for 1994. I was blown away when "Seven", the first track on the album, start playing. "Damn", I said to myself, "this is fucking good!" It was like Christmas, except it was 10 days early and I already owned the gift. That is why I recommend to everyone to collect as many albums as you can just so you can forget about them. Rediscovery is the best part. You liked them at one time so chances are you will like them when you find them at the bottom of a box in 2 years. However there is that rare occasion when you bust out Milli Vanilli, and completely forget about the whole scandal and how fucking bad they are, in that case it is a least a lesson relearned. So keeping in the Christmas spirit all of you should dive into you old albums and come up with something you have not listened to in ages, pop it in and enjoy. Fell free to leave me a comment and let me know what nugget of joy you have stumbled upon. Also I have to give a shout out real quick to my awesome girlfriend Brie who scored some ROTK tickets online yesterday. Way to be net savvy! I will give you all the official low-down tomorrow (spoiler-free of course). If y'all are seeing it tonight, right on. If not, too bad for you (he he). Until tomorrow keep those records spinnin'. B

2003-12-16T16:08:00.000-05:00

What's funnier than a Mormon?

The answer: a closeted gay Mormon republican lawyer. Otherwise known as John Pitt, one of the main characters in HBO's Angels in America. Being an avid watcher of Sunday night drama on HBO, I have been seeing ads for this movie for about 2 months now. All I knew was that it was starring Al Pacino and about hot angels. Being a big fan of Al Pacino and angelic/demonic lore and mythology I was in. On top of that Carnival had just ended and I needed something to fill Sunday night void left behind. What I got was not what I expected. But as I have come to learn that is not always a bad thing. As it turns out Pacino is playing real life Roy Cohn. For those of you don't know, Cohn was special prosecutor for the government during the McCarthy hearings. He was Joe's right hand man. On top of that he remained a powerful figure and all around asshole in the American Right until the mid 80's when he died from AIDS. Yep another gay republican. Pacino does an amazing job that he and few others are capable of. The rest of the story revolves around Pryor Walter another gay man with AIDS and Lewis, his Jewish lover who leaves him when he finds out about Pryor's cancer. Oh yeah, the twist is that Pryor is visited by angels and is a prophet. Tony Kushner who is the gay secular Jewish agnostic writer of the play turned movie has spun a very surreal journey. The movie is worth watching just for the new theology it creates, not to mention the great plot and superb acting. The end leaves a very interesting proposition that unlike Nietzsche, God is not dead, he has just left and abandoned everything. Pryor gives a great speech about how it he returns, the angels and man should sue him for stepping out like a dead-beat dad. HBO will probably be playing this for a while. I strongly recommend checking out. It just might surprise you. B

2003-12-15T12:44:00.000-05:00

"Ladies and gentlemen, we got 'em"

Pretty much anyone who has a TV will recognize the title of this post as the announcement that Paul Bremmer made at a press conference to announce that the US Military had finally captured Saddam Hussein. For some odd reason these words really struck me as odd, almost anticlimactic. I mean after an 8 month man hunt for the guy demonized as the most evil man on the planet and all Paul can say is "We got 'em"? I'm not quite sure if I expected us never to find him, like the much loved OBL, but I know I expected more. I know that his capture is going to be much like the cry of WMDs in the way it is going to be more of a political flag to wave than doing any actual good. Thoughts of Bush and Co. Holding a pay-per-view event where W, Dickey, Rummy, and Condie each take turns beating the Unibomber-looking Hussein with sticks or maybe stoning him death come to mind. I mean isn't that what the American people want? Isn't that why we went to war? You can say all you want about liberation, democratization, or homeland security, but I know the truth. Americans want this guy's head on stick. Maybe we have watched Die Hard one to many times or maybe we just want our typical American scapegoat. We can't catch OBL so this guy will have to do. I think that is why we hate suicide bombers so much. We want the guy to live so we can kill him. If he kills himself in the process that's cheating. All of this really is just disturbing to me, but until someone proves me wrong I am sure that this is the case. Even after Saddam's capture we had 5 more troops die so far, more to come I'm sure. With the tribunal coming up I am sure there will be more news to follow. If there is a pay-per-view event plan on a viewing party at my house. Stonings are so much more dramatic on a big screen. B

2003-12-12T16:04:00.000-05:00

Roller Coaster Week

There are 13 days until Christmas and for some reason it feels like middle of March, except without St. Patty's day. Work has been a real killer but there have been some pretty cool things too. Wednesday night I won some money playing poker with the guys and last night a bunch of us went to see Dave Attell and Lewis Black at the Murat. Dave Attell was real funny as were the opening acts, but Lewis Black is by far my favorite. You may know him for his stand up on Comedy Central or from the best news show around, The Daily Show, with his commentary section Back in Black. When he gets real mad his arms are flailing and he is damn near going into convultions, funny shit. Being at the Murat he opened his act by saying: "Who the fuck would build an entire room in the middle of Indiana dedicated to the fucking Egyptians. Just great an entire fucking room dedicated to a culture that oppressed my people for thousands of years!" Now I am not going to go through and butcher all the jokes from last night but my point is that after a long hard week funny stuff really brightened my day. Kinda like on South Park when Butter's said: "No way Stan. I would
rather be a crying pussy than be some fagoty Goth kid." That was funny shit too. If you want to check out more about Louis Black check out his site here. Also don't forget about this funny site. Well kids I am off to drink myself into a stupor, get excited, God knows I am! Have a good weekend. B

2003-12-10T08:52:00.000-05:00

Fun with Jesus and Lawn Ornaments

My favorite thing about Christmas time has got to be lawn and house decoration. This is not because I like to look at all the pretty lights. I gave up hallucinogens along time ago. It is because it reminds me of one my favorite stories and one of the best schemes I have ever had the good fortune of being apart of. A couple years back me and some nameless coworkers (you know who you are) we discussing a funny news story we had heard about a bunch of garden gnomes being abducted in Paris France by a radical group calling themselves the Garden Gnome Liberation Front. We thought this was hysterical. Now liberation of garden, lawn, and porch decoration is nothing new. I can think of at least one ceramic penguin that was kidnapped and taken all over the world. Be the thing that really got our minds into a whirl was the fact that it was Christmas time when we heard of this. We decided that it was a travesty how baby Jesus was being held captive in lawns all across America during the Yuletide and we decided it was up to us to help him out. Thus the Baby Jesus Liberation Front was founded. Our goal was to go house to house and "borrow" all the baby Jesi we could find. We would toe tag each one with the address or origin just in case the cops thought we were stealing. On Christmas Eve at midnight we were going to go downtown to Monument Circle and deposit all of the Jesi on the steps with little protest signs they could carry. We never did get around to actually doing this but it is still one of the best ideas I think I have ever been apart of. For more fun with Jesus check out this. B

2003-12-09T15:53:00.000-05:00

Congress' Ongoing Neglect and Misuse of the Alphabet and Neolinguistics

This has got to be the most interesting title of a post I have done yet. I think it even beats "Gay Rights and Michele Branche". I was listening to NPR today and I heard a story that Congress wants to pass the "Controlling the Assault of Non-Solicited Pornography and Marketing Act of 2003" or it's cute name "CAN-SPAM". This led me to think about Congress and their constant need to give big, complicated, multi-hundred page legislation cute names. The most notorious of these being "The Uniting and Strengthening America by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism Act of 2001" better know as the "USA Patriot Act". I think these cute names are a problem. I mean when you say you are against the "Patriot" Act you sound like a traitor. Now if you were against the "We Can Spy On Anyone We Damn Well Feel Like Act" that would be a different story. Now the Patriot Act gets a lot of the heat, but I think there are other bills that are just as bad and just as deceptively named. I think the politicians owe it to their constituents and we owe it to ourselves to not use these acronyms but instead think of proper titles for the legislation they try to pass under our watch. By the way speaking of acronyms, like the title? Tell me what you think. B

2003-12-08T09:36:00.000-05:00

It's that time of year...
That's right everyone with the holidays rapidly approaching it is time for top ten lists of 2003. In the spirit of this I have compiled a list of albums that I think are some of the best that 2003 had to offer. I know most of you will be pissed off right away, but please bear with me and just remember that you are wrong. Here is the list:
10. Dave Matthews: Some Devil Most of you will disagree with me on this one, but I think it is a quite an accomplishment for Dave. On his first studio solo album he collaborates with Trey Anastasio and Tim Reynolds among others. It is the laundry list of guests who really give this disc a nice sound. Dave has gone darker than any of the DMB albums except for the unreleased Lillywhite Sessions. I like it. Good song writing and strong themes help make this album sneak it's way into the top 10. Even though it is cool to hate Dave on principle this is really worth a listen. His best work in years.
9. Ryan Adams: Rock N Roll He was good in Whiskeytown and he is just as good solo. Adams continues the great tradition of No Depression with another stellar work. Having something for everyone, it is called "Rock N Roll" but there are still deep roots in country as well as even a little bluesy fell at some points. Fellow bloggers will also be interested to know that Adams is known as quite the blogger himself. His other album released this year, "Love is Hell", did not make the list because I could not get over the fact he decided to cover a shitty Oasis song. Proof that being prolific does not equal it all being quality.
8. Outkast: Speakerboxxx/The Love Below How could the most anticipated hip hop album of the year not make it onto my list? This two disc set really is a treat. On Speakerboxxx you have Big Boi kickin down serious old school 808 based rap, while on The Love Below you have Andre "Ice Cold" 3000 making the long lost Prince album. This a lot like packaging the Mono Lisa with Swans Reflecting Elephants into a two disc set. Although both brilliant, they could be stylisticly farther apart. This album also gets the side award for spawning the best video for "Hey Ya". If you have not seen it, check it out. Real quality film making combined with a song that just makes you want to shake your ass. You should already own this album.
7. The Postal Service: Give Up This album marks the first in a disturbing trend that can be seen later on the list as well. This is an album that Brie really loves and after hearing it over and over again it had really grown on me. Although Ben Gibbard does sound like a prepubescent twelve year old singing about ex-girlfriends he does not sound old enough to have had yet, it is suprisingly good. Although most of the critics raved hard about his other work this year, Death Cab for Cutie's "Transatlantasism", this is by far the better of the two. After seeing him live with DCFC and wishing he would play songs by the Postal Service this became brutally apparent.
6. Grandaddy: Sumday This is yet another album inspired by Brie. This one has really grown on me. I must admit that you have to love a band that it trying single handedly to make trucker hats and footlong beards cool. And they are actually succeeding. Not to mention that the complex blend of synths and guitars is really fun to listen to. They seemed like they might have some mainstream success for about 2 weeks but it looks like they have fallen back under the radar. Although not as good as their earlier effort, "The Sophtware Slump", one of the best albums of 2003.
5. Hey Mercedes: Loses Control Some of you old school indie kids will remember a little indie outfit out of Chicago named Braid. And some of you might be wondering what ever happened to them. Well Hey Mercedes is what happened to them. Although the sound is different it is kinda the same band. This is yet another Brie inspired choice and as of late has been in heavy rotation. It is very emo, but the singer has a more adult sound to him, it even vaguely resembles Alkaline Trio. For those of you who like to rock out hard, give this a listen.
4. Black Eyed Peas: Elephunk definitely my choice for Hip Hop album of the year. If any of you have seen an iPod commercial with copious amounts of ass shaking you have heard some of the new Peas. These songs have great lyrics and are groovy as hell. When I think of something I would shake my ass to on the dance floor, this album is it. Not to mention it holds the honor of having the best song to rock a party of the year, "Let's Get Retarded". Raise you glasses, shake your asses and get down like the clown.
3. Widespread Panic: Ball After losing a founding member and lead guitarist Michael Houser to pancreatic cancer everyone was wonder what would happen to the pioneering group of southern country-rock jam bands. They decided to press on and returned to the studio and put together this amazing album. These songs are just a suited to sitting on you porch drinking a beer and watching the sun set as they are to dancing like a mad fool at a three day festival in rural Tennesee. This band has always been a favorite and they come through again in a big way.
2. The Long Winters: When I Pretend to Fall Definitely the biggest and best surprise of 2003. I saw these guys live at a Death Cab for Cutie show as the openers. They were fantastic. After having the balls to cover Madonna and doing it well, they went on to completely rock out. It is kinda confusing though that a self proclaimed emo band (read as likes to cry in the dark) could have such a fun and upbeat album. "Cinnamon" is definitely the stand out track. You have never heard of them and that's ok, go buy the album today.
1. Tori Amos: Scarlet's Walk Now I have to admit that I am a little biased being as Tori is one of my favorite artists of all time, but she has really done it this time. Her best work since "Under the Pink". Not only is it a brilliant concept album but the lyrics and song writing style are absolutely unparalleled. "Taxi Ride" is the number one song of the year. It is amazing. Not to mention the best show I have seen all year. Tori is the best female song writer since Joni Mitchell. A must have.

2003-12-05T14:52:00.000-05:00

Who is John ~~Holmes~~ Galt?

I was out surfing the blogsphere when I came across something I thought was kinda funny. Now one thing I enjoy doing is checking out personal ads and then laughing hysterically. I ran across the most niche dating site I have ever seen. Atlasphere.com is for hooking up people who both like the longer works of Ayn Rand like Atlas Shrugged. Now being a both a very big fan of this book and a very big fan of making fun a personals I was intrigued. I was some what disheartened to learn that there were only 36 women on this site and over 150 men. Hmmm, I found that rather unfortunate. Apparently there aren't that many Daphnes out there and there are way to many Johns. But isn't that always the problem. I still don't know which John is worse to think you are. Girls stay away from these men, they are scary. Something tells me that Ayn Rand did not intend for her Nietzcheian uberman to be compared to the most well hung porn star of the modern age. But then again isn't the fact that you can make that comparison at all what makes the modern age great? Definitely a question for objectivists to moll over for some time. For the rest of you out there is it better to be a super genius or have a gigantic schlong. Please comment. B

2003-12-02T09:23:00.000-05:00

The Blog is back Muthafuckas!

It's been a long time since I left you with a dope beat to step to... Oh wait sorry about that, it just kinda slipped out. That's right kids after weeks stuck in deep jungle out running the rebels I have managed to stumble across a shrine from some long gone tribe of Congonites that happened to have a telnet terminal. Wow English teachers and journalism majors are going to field day with that one. Kinda funny how I got lost deep in the jungle right after what I considered to be one of my best posts. I guess I was going with the whole Marvin Gaye vs. Stevie Wonder argument of is it better to burn out or fade away. No matter, because I am back. I have also decided to say fuck form. I will post whatever the hell I want from now on. Although being an amateur music critic is kinda fun I feel that I am kinda preachin to the choir. However if I stumble across anything new, good, or obscure I will be sure to pass it on. Now back to what blogs are all about posting humorous things in your daily life and your travels on the web.
So I was on T-shirt Hell this morning and I saw a bunch of Michael Jackson shirts including the one I have posted. I thought they were really funny. You should also check out the wrapping paper. Good stuff. I hope everyone had a good Turkey Day. Mine was filled with entirely too much eating. The rest of the weekend was a nice break though. I whole lot of drinking and a whole lot of sleeping. That's it for today kids. More tomorrow...

2003-11-19T10:46:00.000-05:00

Michele Branch and Gay Rights...

"A long and wicked life followed by five minutes of perfect grace gets you into Heaven. An equally long life of decent living and good works followed by one outburst of taking the name of the Lord in vainÃ‚Â—then have a heart attack at that moment and be damned for eternity. Is that the system?" -- Robert A. Heinlein
Rants
So I probably win the contest for strangest title for a post ever. However, I do think that it lays down the diversity of today's post quite well. First off let's discuss daily life. Last night dad and I went for our now regular Tuesday night dart session. I did much better. In fact I won every game. Two random guys came up to us and asked if we wanted to play a game of teams and Dad and I schooled them. Go Team Schaller. He told me a bunch more stories and we talked about what it was like going to college during the whole Civil Rights thing and Ayn Rand and Allen Greenspan, and stuff. I was nice. That brings me to my next topic. Civil Rights. So yesterday the court in Massachusetts legalized gay marriage. People are pissed off. Now I must say that the only cock I love is my own, but I am pissed off that people are pissed off. I think the whole trying to deny gays marriage is just ridiculous. I think that all of these moral majority assholes should get a taste of these own medicine. Maybe we should take away their voting rights, count them as 3/5s of a person during the census, or make them do equal work for less. Then they might think equal rights were pretty cool. Just because it is no longer PC to oppress black people and women openly now, gay people get the shaft. Ok, that was a pretty bad pun, sorry. The thing that I don't get is that women and minorities are trying to oppress gays too. You would think that they would understand. Fuck. Ok, enough on that, now on to more fun things. So I had this dream last night. I dreamt that it was the weekend of the Brickyard. I was down in Speedway at a friend of mom's house. By the way the friend and house both do not exist. While down there I meet Michele Branch. The first thing I do is call Brie to tell her (Brie hates Miss Branch) and I make Michele play that song she did with Santana to prove it is her. Kinda funny. Then he hang out for a while and I tell her that I think Spirit Room could have been better. She gets a call from her friend who I some how know is black. Michele then tells her friend that she is moving to Atlanta. After this Michele says that there is nothing to do in this town because she does not know anybody, so I give her my number so she can call me later to hit the bars. Then I get attacked by a small dog. Fucked up dream, but kinda entertaining. Her music sucks but she is kinda hot. I blame Monday Night football. Now to rap up the rants I will answer a comment from Mike yesterday wanting to know more about the Bathrooms at Red No Five. Well Mike these bathrooms employ the trough urinal which I usually not a fan of. However the urinal is powered by a giant waterfall from the celing that goes all the way down the wall and like the whole club is back lit with red lights. Plus they have nice sinks. Cool bano.
Music
Now on to music. In keeping with yesterday's theme of electronica today's Band of the Day is Kruder and Dorfmeister. This music is a way differnt from the driving beats of Sven Vath, this is laid back Trip Hop that sometimes borders of D&B. Good stuff although it is constantly refered to by the stall fo Luna Music as stoner music, which I can totally see. I highly recomend the DJ Kicks disc they have, and especially track 3. Good stuff. If you like them and want to persue other crazy Austrian trip hop check out Peter Kruder's other project, the Peace Orchestra. I'll keep whis short since rants was so long today, but if you like trip hop and want something other than the manufactured garbage on Ultra Chilled. Check these guys out.

2003-11-18T10:45:00.000-05:00

Darts and DJs...

"The first duty of a revolutionary is to get away with it." -- Abbie Hoffman
Rants
I wanted to post on Friday but I was too hungover to accomplish that goal. The reason for this sad state was that Thursday night was the first ever Schaller family father-son bonding excursion. We went to the Wellington drank beer and played darts. I enjoy playing darts, which is probably why I do it 3 to 4 times a week. However even with my large amounts of practice and dad claiming he had not played in 30 some odd years, he still managed to kick my ass. He claims I let him win, but well, no. The darts and drinks were good but the real highlight of the evening was the stories he told. I will share one of my favorites. For those of you who know the Broad Ripple area, you know about Hardwicke's Tobacco Shop. Let me tell you a story about Hardwicke's. You see, Hardwicke's was originally owned by a guy named Tony the Bong. Tony was married to his wife, Betty Long Nipple. As if that is not funny enough, Tony the Bong sells Hardwicke's to a buddy of my dad's named Mike Morran so he can move to Amsterdam with his wife and make porn flicks. Now my friends, that is a good story. We are now having regularly scheduled Father-Son 6 o'clock on Tuesdays for more darts, beer, and stories. Do not fear I will keep the good stories posted.
Music
Now in honor of some friends up north I have decided to change Band of the Day into DJ of the day. Amanda and Brandon, you guys should like this. Oh, Amanda is also right about the Cheat pulling off a gold tooth. For those of you who do not know about the Cheat please check him out on the link to Homestar Runner. Good shit. Today's DJ of the Day is that crazy German Sven Vath. When you need some crazy hard tech and still want the dance floor hoppin, he does a pretty alright job. Some of you may remember that the picture above was taken at Sven's set at Red No Five in Chicago on November 2 of last year. Red No Five also has my favorite bathrooms in Chi-town. I strongly recommend them. Matt and Brandon can vouch for this as well. If you want to check out some Sven on disk if you can find a copy of the set from Crobar, it comes highly recommended. I have no idea where you would get that though. Ok that's a lie. If you just want to run to the store pick up any one of his 2 disc "In the Mix" set's done like from Cocoon's Amnesia night in Ibiza. Hope you like hard hitting, unrelenting beats. Until tomorrow keep those heads bobbin...

2003-11-13T11:55:00.000-05:00

Day 1...

"They have exiled me now from their society and I am pleased, because humanity does not exile except the one whose noble spirit rebels against despotism and oppression. He who does not prefer exile to slavery is not free by any measure of freedom, truth and duty." --Kahil Gibran

Rants
I would like to welcome everyone to day one of our new crusade, "Save your neighborhood Byron from oppression in the workplace". If you do not have neighborhood Byron feel free to support me in this charity. For just 50 cent a day, the price of a cup of coffee, you can help a Byron cast off the chains of tyranny and live life as it was meant to be lived. Right, so your probably not going to send me money but the idea of mooching off the world does seem kind of appealing. I must say that we were lucky to get out of yesterday in one piece. If I had a dollar for every time I said OMGISFW (Oh my god it's still fucking Wednesday) I would be a rich man. Driving home in 60 degree sunny weather I must did help a lot. Then we (we being Brie, Steve, Bone, and myself) polished off the rest of the evening by playing a ruckus game of darts and having a rather enjoyable burrito. 7 or 8 beers later I felt alright. It was so enjoyable that today after work my father and I are going to enjoy a little father-son bonding time and play some more darts at The Wellington. By the way y'all should check out that link it is totally lame.
Music
As pictured above, today's band of the day is The Old 97's. As you all can see I have been a quite a big alt.country kick for some god knows why reason. I have been jammin to these guys at work lately and I thought they deserved a spot on the blog. I also really wanted to use this picture of them playing at The Fez because of the cool guy sportin' the yellow trucker hat. Yeah trucker hats. Ali I am sure that you would agree with today's choice being a Rhett fan. I must say though seeing the band is concert was way better than seeing Rhett Miller solo opening for Tori Amos. The band was solid but Rhett rushed through all of his songs at a lightning pace. Songs of note that I enjoy are "Oppenheimer", "Four Leaf Clover" and "Barrier Reef". Give em a whirl. They are a little to rock to be country, but a little too country to be rock. Good stuff...

2003-11-12T15:06:00.000-05:00

War...

"There comes a time when every man feels the urge to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and start slitting throats." -- H.L. Mencken

Rants
Welcome back Conginites. As you can see today we are flying under the black flag. Pay no attention to the bodies on the ground, those are just props. I do apologize for the long delay in posts and thanks to Ali for the kick in the ass. This week so far has been a rough one and it is still fucking Wednesday. Actually that is not totally fair. Everything before 8 and after 5 has been pretty decent. I am just not enjoying work this week. I know your not supposed to think of work as Happy Fun Time in La La land, but it sure would be nice. I came up with my ultimate job for me right now today as I was day dreaming about what to do instead of throwing myself off of a cliff. I need a job as the IS manager for a nice little 50 to 100 person Non-For-Profit where I can grow out my hair, grow a beard, where jeans and sneakers in the winter and shorts and flip-flops in the summer, have my own office, and make like 60-65K a year. That, my friends, would be heaven on earth. So if any of you know if such a place exists please forward them my name. Meanwhile I am still here at Inatech being ground through the corporate (albeit small) machine.
Music
On a completely different note it is time for the Band of the Day. Now by the sound of the above section one would think that the band of the day would be Nick Drake or something else dark and depressed. Well, it's not. I have been on a big kick Razor and Tie Records and Bloodshot Records kick. Now I will admit that the alt.country feel of Bloodshot does kinda meander down Depression Road, today's Artist of the Day is Dar Williams! Dar Williams has been wicked big on the New England folk seen since the early 90's. Only now is she beginning to receive a little more national recognition and radio play. Her style is definitely not something that here everyday. He simple acoustic melodies accompanying her high voice and rambling narrative lyrics. Here stories are always very interesting and fun to listen to like "The Pointless, Yet Poignant, Crisis of a Co-Ed" and "The Babysitter's Here". Sprunger I know what you are thinking and, no. For a shitty week at work at least I have something to entertain myself with. Good tunes...

2003-11-06T10:40:00.000-05:00

Big ups and shout outs...

Rants
I would like to start off today by giving big ups to my comment posting compatriot Alison. Thank you for all of your wonderful comments and correcting me when I forget the name of a song that I like. What would I do without you. Not only is Ali a grammatical wiz and insightful commenter, but recently her blog (see the "Wide World of Blogs") had a post about the rules for rock audiences that was riotously funny. I strongly recommend checking it out. I am once again killing time in the dungeon that is my office by downloading and checking out the wide world of music that is out there. Unfortunately in my travels I come across a lot of absolute junk. However I do run into some pretty cool new things or things that I just forgot about. The only thing better than new music is music you have always had and you rediscover, it's like Christmas everyday. Speaking of music...
Music
For today's Band of the Day we venture back to the early 1990's and to a little state called Illinois. Today's Band of the Day is Uncle Tupelo. When UT released there first album "No Depression" they kicked off a new sub genre. Call it Americana, call it Roots-Rock, I like alt.country. Aside from the Man in Black I do not like country. However when these guys started mixing punk sensibilities with a little twang, suddenly it was not so bad. On top of that "No Depression" turned into the name of the genre fan club and then became a pretty decent music rag for the genre that still is published today. Sounds like these guys did a lot right, that's not even the half of it. When UT broke up Son Volt was formed by Jay Farrar and Wilco was formed by Jeff Tweedy. That's right kids the band who's crazy experimental album topped everyone's top ten for 2002 got it's start a little twangier (that is so not a word). My favorite tracks for the band are: "The Long Cut", "Anodyne", and "Whiskey Bottle". My favorite album is definitely "Anodyne". Next time you feel like a little twang will still rockin' it DIY, check out Uncle Tupelo.

2003-11-05T15:29:00.000-05:00

The newness abounds...

Hello everyone! It is my pleasure to introduce you all to the new "In the Congo"! We are no longer secretly in the Amazon. As you can see, we have new cooler pictures (without price discounts), there are more links, and the important ones now no longer link to Amazon (as I was apparently trying to peddle you all merchandise), but to cool new places. Oh yeah, and the monkey up top is gone. Enjoy! We are also going to start having 2 daily sections, rants and music. And with that clarification on to the rants...
Rants
So I have been thinking... I want to a "job" in music. Don't get me wrong, I already have a nice day job at Inatech (I mean Lantech) and I can't sing that well when I am not in the car. I mean something along the lines of weekend record store clerk, or working for a small promotion company/ indie label, or freelance writing/reviewing. I don't even really care about being paid (although that would be a nice bonus), I just want to do it for fun. If anyone has an idea of how to go about doing this, please let me know.
Music
As you can tell by my nifty new picture. The Band of the Day is Dayton, Ohio's own Guided by Voices. I don't think you can find a more prolific song writer than former school teacher/ frontman Robert Pollard. He has an astounding 4000 songs under his belt. However as of late he has said that he will trim it down to 50 new a year. That is still quite a lot. Even with Ryan Adam's ambitious multiple albums in a year, it comes nowhere close. Polard uses many of these songs in GBV but he also has many side projects. With the release of another box set, Hardcore UFOs, you can get even more unreleased songs from the lab. My personal favorites are "Teenage FBI", "Glad Girls", and "I am a Scientist". My favorite album being "Isolation Drills". Good Stuff. On top of that the biggest record store supporter of GBV is here in Indy, Luna Music. They are obsessed with these guys. If you want some lo-fi rock that occasionally borders more on the College Radio side of things, give these guys a spin...

2003-11-04T09:59:00.000-05:00

Thank you to everyone who keeps posting comments. I am glad to see we have so many Bowie fans. I myself am a fan of Labyrinth. But you know Ali, you can't go home again, or something. I would also like to clarify something. In the last post I made it sound like Carlos liked "Fity Cent" and Creed. Carlos, I apologize I know you have better taste than that. Also per your request, everyone can now find a link to a wonderful script resource in my link section. Also you can now find a section on the blogs that I visit and radio on the net. You should check out the link to the RLD guide on Giga. It's kinda funny. Also Ali you will be happy to know that Brie and I both won at hipster bingo in Qdoba last night. We thought it was kind funny.
Speaking of hipsters, let's talk about a special kind of hipster, the Mod. Get on your Vespa and let your shaggy hair blow, the Band of the Day is The Who. Talk about under-rated. While John, Paul, George, and Ringo were still writing songs to pick up fourteen-year-olds, Pete, Keith, and Roger were defining rock music and dare I say it, distortion. There would be no Backstreet Boys without the Beatles. There would be no Rage Against the Machine without The Who. I think they deserve a special prize for that. Plus on top if releasing great albums like "Who's Next", "Tommy", and "The Who Sell Out", they have been on the Simpsons. So you are listening to Baba O'Riley please call it by it's proper name and say a small thanks to The Who, they deserve it...

2003-11-02T15:36:00.000-05:00

Welcome everyone to this weekend edition of "In The Congo". Once again we are broadcasting for Sprungonia. Today is that special time of the week when we take some time to answer our devoted reader's comments. Lets' start by going to Wednesday's post about the Smiths. Let me just start off by saying this is not a Union blog. This blog makes no affiliation with any union including this one. However I do enjoy the union beer. Also Carlos, I am sorry but you are just plain wrong. Whiney, yes. Self indulgent, yes. But it is at least good. Unlike the shit poured down our throats today. I have had enough of "Fity Cent", fucking learn how to pronounce shit. And I mean come on, Creed. Fucking deep music for shallow people. At least Brittany and Michelle are nice to look at, but that's about it. Deep breath. Sorry about that, I get a little heated.
Now on to the comment form Mike on Thursday. First off I would like to congratulate you on your good choice of music. And you are correct, I did not mention Loaded in my list. But as you should know. A top five is not really a top five. It is more like at top twenty to thirty that rotates depending on time, place, mood, all kinds of things. As always please keep the comments coming. This is a dialogue not a monologue.
Now on to the Artist of the day. David Bowie. Bowie is one of the few great innovators of the past 30 years. He has worked with everyone from Jagger to Eno to Reznor to Henson. Even though he had a brief spandexed stint as the Goblin King, I can forgive him. He has brought us Ziggy Stardust, Aladdin Sane, Young Americans, and most recently Reality. His body of work as is expansive as it is diverse. So please everyone go break out some "Dance, Baby, Dance" and throw a kidnapped child in the air, it's fun...Really....

2003-10-30T19:18:00.000-05:00

So there I was back in the bunker today. Nothing quite says boredom like being in a 200x200 raised floor room that is all bright white with 1 other person sitting way in the corner, all day. Although I was justly rewarded when I left. On my day drive home I rolled down the windows, opened the sunroof, and jammed hard to Lou Reed and the Velvet Underground "Loaded". WOW. Talk about one of my favorite all time TOP FIVE albums. That leads to today's band of the day! The Velvet Underground. They have sampled and imitated but no one is as cool as Lou Reed. Wow. As I sit here I am being mocked my Matt saying that Lou Reed is not the coolest. Well he is just plain wrong. That's right kids I am not broadcasting from the home base today. Today "In the Congo" should actually be "In Sprungonia". Scary place. Oh well, enough of that. Back to Lou Reed. "Sweet Jane", track two on "Loaded" has got to be one of my favorite songs. In fact if I am allowed to procreate, my daughter, named Jane. And if I ever get a ferret, he will be named Lou. but that's for different reasons. I wonder If I can get a ferret with a purple Mohawk...

2003-10-29T13:48:00.000-05:00

Welcome back everyone to day three in what I hope will be a week of constant updates just like oral sex and the weather channel. So I was driving around downtown this afternoon during my lunch break listening to NPR (I am an NPR junkie) and Terrie Gross on "Fresh Aire" was interviewing Joe Pernice about his new book "Meat is Murder". This book is part of a new series of books call the Thirty Three and a Third series. These books are semi autobiographical novels by musicians about how a great album affects the life of the protagonist. This has got to be the most brilliant idea I have ever heard of! To quote my favorite movie: "Call me shallow, Movies, Music, Books, these things matter". I am going to run to the book store right after work and pick the first one up. I Urge you all to do the same.
This, once again, segues into my next order of business, the band of the day. I thought that in honor of the great idea and book listed above, today's Band of the Day is The Smiths. Before Radiohead was crooning out songs about teen angst, alienation, depression, and self-loathing another band from across the pond has perfected it. Led by a self proclaimed gay celibate man (I wonder if he was Episcopalian?), The Smiths wrapped up an entire generation. Although I may be a little young to have seen it first hand, I think that if my parents had been a little cooler I would have been jamming to "Meat is Murder" with my little purple Mohawk on the way home from kindergarten....

2003-10-28T15:58:00.000-05:00

Ha ha, two days in a row. Who would have thought? Welcome back to another exciting day in the congo. Well I must admit that today is not all that exciting. I mean it still is Tuesday. However I do have big plans this evening of beating Zelda after work and starting the new game I just procured: "Grand Theft Auto: Vice City", this should be good stuff. After that I will most likely spend a low key evening with Brie.
Now on to bigger and more exciting things, the band, or in this case artist, of the day! Today I have chosen Beth Orton. One of her latest CDs, "Daybreaker" is in constant rotation with me. Her other albums like "Central Reservation" and "Trailer Park" are also quite good. I hope you all are enjoying the album pictures I have been posting to decorate, as you can tell, they are ripped right off of good ole Amazon. Which coincidentally I am told has more anacondas than the Congo does, who would have thought, certainly not me...
Back to Beth for a second, she has thoughtful and intelligent lyrics and interesting collaborations (ala Ryan Adams... If you into cocky alt county, which I kinda am...). I think y'all will enjoy her. Until tomorrow keep those horizons expanding...~bs!

2003-10-27T13:21:00.000-05:00

So after a week of inactivity I am back. All of you who were wondering if Charlie had won, I assure you that is not the case. However I am pleased to regale you tales from the past week. First off I broke down and got a GameCube so I can play Zelda. This has been the majority of my week. The graphics are awesome and the story is great. All in all, a good time. This weekend on the other hand was a little more active. After having drinks at everyone's favorite pretensious club, "The Red Room" (personally, I don't see exactly what is so red about it...) and seeing some old friends I slept until 6 PM the next day when I got up, showered, ate and then helped some a friends (while is costume as a pirate) float 2 kegs. Steve and I absolutely ruled the Baruit table as well. Iceman and Maverick went down many, many times. It was a great hootin nanny.
For those of you who don't know there are three levels of party. You have, in order of least to greatest, a "get-together", a "shindig", and a "hootin nanny". This was definitely a "hootin nanny". Even though the music selection was not that great. Which brings me to my next point . The music would have been better if they had played songs by today's Band of the Day: The Roots. I can not say enough good things about these guys. They are amazing. They are hip-hop, r and b, a little rock, and a whole lot of fat man with a fro. The fro-havin' fat man is none other than ?uestlove. The drummer and musical foundation of the group. He is on my list, with Jon Fishman and John Bonham, of personal heroes. If you live under a rock and do not know about the Roots. Check-em' out today. Until tomorrow (and this time I mean it)...~bs!

2003-10-20T13:30:00.000-05:00

Welcome back on this Monday. For being a Monday it has been suprisingly good so far. I am starting off this week with a new feature on "In the Congo", Band of the Day. Today's Band of the Day goes to Ivy. Ivy is a fine band that you can now find a link to in my "Listening" links. Nice Inde Pop with a female lead and catchy hooks. I have always been a sucker for female vocals, but the layered guitars and occasional use of horns make this a stand out. If you like Beth Orton or St. Etienne, give this a whirl. Check out "The Best Thing" on "Apartment Life", one of my favorites.
I am enjoying my new office. I have achived a whole new level of slacking that I neve thought was possible before. Plus it has been a lot of fun to decorate. Everyone keep sending comments, I enjoy them. Thanks to Carlos and Jenny, good to hear from both of you. Remember to spread the word, the world needs more Congoites. Till tomarrow...

2003-10-17T16:04:00.000-05:00

Hello again. I have added quite a bit to my blog today. I have added comments and a counter to keep track of have many adoring fans I have. I also saw that my link to Ali's site did not work. Apparently my HTML skills just are not that good. The site is http://closeproximity.blogspot.com . This has been a pretty good Friday so far. I finally, after 2 years of waiting, got my own office today! After work I am going to go throw some darts at my favorite hangout, the Wellington, with some buddies. Later on I believe seeing "School of Rock" is on the list of things to do. My heart goes out to all of you Sox fans. I was talking with my buddy Matt this morning about it and came up with this: "You know why the communists had all of the USSR? They could buy all the best players." I guess that explains how I feel about the Yankees, fuckin' commies. Hope all of you have a good weekend. I sure plan to. Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Till' Monday. OMGISFW....

2003-10-16T15:32:00.000-05:00

Welcome back y'all. As proof that I never accomplish my plans as I intend, I missed my second post yesterday. Oh well. A lot of things have happened since my first post. First off FUCK the Marlins. Ok, that should cover that. Second off while my friends have been watching the Cubs in their downward spiral, I have been very entertained. First I went with my wonderful girlfriend, Brie, and saw "Kill Bill", the new Tarintino movie. WOW. If you like Samurai flicks you will love this film. If you like Quintin, Uma, or Lucy you will love this film. If you have a pulse you will probably at least like this film. Great plot, nice story design, awesome blood and gore, and even a little bit of anime. Awesome. The day after I was very entertained as well. Brie and I met up with Ali and Jeremy at the Death Cab for Cutie show. Brie is a gigantic DCFC fan and she loved it. I thought their set was ok, but the real show stealer was the opening band, "The Long Winters". For more info on this great band check out Ali's cool blog site at This reaffirms what has been happening to me a lot over the past 2 years. I will go to a show to see a band I know, and will end up being blown away by the opener who I have never heard of before. I like this trend. Hearing new great music for the first time, especially live, is one of the few truly great pleasures in life. So until tomorrow, go out and find a show of a band you have never heard and check it out. They may suck ass, they may be your new favorite...

2003-10-14T13:43:00.000-05:00

Welcome to "So there I was, in the Congo" the new blog documenting the life and times of me, Byron. I think that it is appropriate to start off this page with an explanation of the title. It all started when I would have nothing to say or wanted to say something ridiculous to come back to a previously made ridiculous comment. It started off as just "So there I was, in the Congo", but soon it started to take shape as it's own little story. Soon it morphed into "So there I was, the Congo. My gun was drawn. Charlie was all around". This became a little more intriguing so people wanted to know what happened in the battle between me and "Charlie". Then started the real stories, completely ficticious accounts about my time with Charlie in the Congo, sometimes they would be tied into what was really happening sometimes, not. One such story went some thing like this:
" So there I was, in the Congo. My gun was drawn. Charlie was all around. We took to the trees for cover but before we knew it we were surrounded. Being as we had no hope of surviving in the trees, we ran branch to branch like some sick cross between Tarzan, some Swiss Family member Robinson, and a retarded ring-tailed lemur. We dove into the river in hopes of evading our hunters but we were dismayed to find a new foe, a giant Anaconda. This was very disheartening. So out of the river we went onto the banks of the other side thinking we finally had some solace. And then the monkeys came."
For some reason that I am not quite sure of "And then the monkeys came." just sounds ominous. This is a short summary of how I have amused myself and hopefully others in those lulls in conversation. If this has amused you and you would like more please come back and visit. Thanks for playing.
~bs!